Sex, Seduction and Serena
by xxBeautiful Nightmarexx
Summary: We're going to have sex now,Serena. He stated firmly. What! It's not time! I'm not ready!,I stammered as he pinned me against the wall.You're ready. He whispered before his lips caught mine and he gave me the hottest, most passionate kiss ever...
1. Chapter 1

Let me tell you a story that you most likely won't believe. Just to be fair and to give warning to all you prudes out there (I was one too…_was_ being key word here…) this unbelievable story is about…you guessed it…sex. Raunchy, unadulterated, hot, orgasmic, rough (did I mention hot?!) sex! Let me fill you in on the basics: my name is Serena Tanelian (I know it rhymes with chameleon, hahaha laugh it up, I thought 6th grade was over!). Ummm…hmmm…let's see what else do you need to know…I'm 28 years old, I'm a law student who works at a law firm as a secretary, though school is out for the summer WOOHOO!, I'm not married, I live with my cat, 5 foot 4 inches, one hundred pounds…maybe in my left butt cheek but it feels good to say "100 pounds". Yes, I'm a large woman. I'm big but beautiful, who are you to judge! I'm actually 212 pounds but tell everyone I'm 180. My long blonde hair makes me look a little smaller, how, I'm not quite sure, but again, it makes me feel better if I tell myself that. I think my big blue eyes attract attention to my adorable face and deflect it away from my ass.

Speaking of asses, let me start my story from the beginning with the biggest ass of them all…Darien. I met Darien in a newspaper ad. He was _supposed_ to be one of those self esteem booster people like the really skinny, beautiful models they put on Oprah to help the 300 pound 16 year old teenage girl feel better about herself but afterwards she just feels like eating a big box of Godiva chocolates… mixed with Arsenic. That's Darien, gorgeous and with a butt you could bounce a quarter off! But he's also a "sex tutor". It's for people like me who can't get a good date except for those that are really desperate and think I'll put out just because I'm "the fat chick". Incase you haven't guessed…I'm still a virgin, sorta. I had a bad experience at 17 and nothing's happened since then so I'm practically a virgin. Yes, a 28 year old virgin who is not a nun. So let's go back about 1 week ago…

----------1 week Ago-----------

I lay sprawled out across a bed of silk, naked as the day my mother gave birth to me. My handsome husband hold me close and seductively strokes my skin and kisses my ear, neck, collarbone and slowly starts to descend until he reaches my-

"Serena, bring me a cup of coffee." A husky, arrogant voice snapped over the intercom bringing me back to the sad reality called my life.

"Right away, sir." I answer back sweetly.

I roll away from desk and maneuver myself out of my chair. I straighten out my black Lane Bryant skirt (I got a fabulous deal on it, only $13!) and adjust my pink sweater from riding up too far up my back. I walked into the break room and poured the fuckhead…I mean…my boss a cup of coffee.

"What took so long, Tanelian?" He snorted as soon as I opened the large oak door. He sat with his back to me in the oversized leather office chair behind his mahogany desk. He had an amazing view of New York City from here. We were 70 stories up and I don't think he even took a moment our of his "busy schedule" of hitting on all the secretaries (sans me) and hiding his porn to notice what was behind him!

Most women found him attractive and I would too, if he weren't such an arrogant, chauvinistic, sexist pig…and the dyed platinum blonde hair with the tan-in-a-can spray.

"Sorry sir, I had to find another box of sugar packets." I stammered as I sat the hot cup on his desk.

Would you believe the ass didn't even say thank you!? He just kept looking down and reading his paper not once acknowledging me!

"Is that all, sir?"

He spun around to face me

"Did I _say_ I wanted anything else?"

"No sir." I looked down; I could feel my face flushing every shade of red imaginable.

"Then what does that tell you?"

I didn't even make eye contact as I flew out of the room as fast as I could. I felt like crying. Aside from the fact it was that wonderful time of month and I wanted nothing more then to be at home in my cozy little apartment in my sweat pants cuddled up on the couch with my cat, I hated the way he always made me feel…worthless and stupid.

I went home that night and ate carry out from the little Chinese restaurant down the street. I stuffed sweet n' sour chicken in mouth and sipped on the bottle of red wine that's been sitting in my fridge three New Year's Eve's ago. I wiped the tears from eyes as I sat at the dining room table…alone. Not even my cat, Luna, wanted to come out and greet me or keep me company. God, how pathetic! My own cat can't stand me either! I threw down the fork and just sat there and sobbed. I held my head in my hands and cried like I always did when I came home from work. I got up from the table and sulked my way into my bedroom and collapsed on the bed hugging the pillow tight for comfort. Luna came out from hiding and curled up next to me softly purring. I scratched her head a little and looked out the oversized window into the city's night sky.

"Someday Luna, I won't always be alone. You're the only friend I have." I talked to her between sobs and hiccups.

I cried a little more and drifted off into a deep sleep.

--------

I sat in the break room by myself as usual poking at my lunch. I didn't feel like eating. I sipped on my Diet Coke and looked around the dingy white room for something to read, a magazine, newspaper, anything! I got up from the ugly orange table and put my lunch in the trash. I noticed someone had thrown out a paper so I garbage picked it. Bastard should've recycled! I read all about Paris going to jail, and Britney getting out of rehab and gas prices giving us a kick in the ass. For the hell of it I decided to look in the classifieds. That's when I saw it. The ad of all ads. The one little 3 x 3 square that would change my life forever.

_Are you overweight? Can't get a date? Have low self- esteem? You are not alone! Are your pets your only friends? We will help create a new and improved you! We are here to help you, money back guarantee. Call 586-555-0198 for a free consultation. Don't wait, limited time offer! Space limited, restrictions may apply. _

My prayers have been answered. No more feeling worthless or stupid for me. I was going to be a new Serena. A better Serena. A happy Serena.


	2. Chapter 2

Hesitantly, my fingers dialed the numbers. I closed my eyes and winced as I heard the line start dialing.

"You ok, Serena?"

My eyes popped open quickly and I slammed the phone down quickly.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. Just making a business call, that's all." I managed to sputter out nervously.

My co-worker Mina gave me a weird look. I envy her; her long thick, curly golden hair and big baby blue eyes. It drove all the guys wild. Not to mention her tiny waist, long legs, or the way she shakes her hips back and forth when she walks which gives almost every man there an erection. I hated her. A lot…

"If you say so…" She haughed at me.

I sighed a deep sigh of relief when she walked away and started flirting with another intern. Her laugh made me want to vomit.

"Tanelian, get in here. Now."

I groaned as I got up from the chair and made my way into the office from Hell.

"You called for me, Mr. Shields?" I said meekly.

"My son is going out tonight and needs a date."

My eyes lit up. I've heard stories about Mr. Shields's son. I heard he's one of the most gorgeous men alive, rich and mysterious and knows how to treat a girl right. This was going to be wonderful! A date with Mr. Shields, Jr. I just might not need to call that company after all.

"I'd love to, sir. It'd be an honor." I exclaimed joyously.

"Great, go pick up his suit from the cleaners and drop it off at this address." He scribbled something down on a post-it.

I took the note and with a confused look I asked," I'm sorry sir; I thought you said your son needed a date, not someone to do his errands?"

"I found him a date. But he's unavailable right now and won't have time to pick up the suit himself so I'm sending you to do it." He answered not even looking at me as he lit a cigar.

I wanted to die. Right now. I don't think I had ever been so embarrassed in my entire life. Well, it'd be a close second to the time when I was 17 and had sex for the first time with the biggest nerd from school. I got past his crater face and comb over just because I was glad to have a date for Prom. Afterwards we went into the back of his dad's 89' Geo and started getting hot and heavy. It wouldn't have been so bad if I wouldn't have asked "Is it in yet?" after we had supposedly been doing it for the last fifteen minutes. But I digress…

"I see. Well, when do you want me to go?" I whispered trying to hold back tears.

"Well let's see, his date is tonight so why don't you go, let's say…next week!" He roared sarcastically.

"I'll go right now, sir." I looked away as I walked out the door.

I grabbed my purse and pink trench coat and walked towards the elevators. I clutched the little note between my stubby fingers until the tips turned white.

'_Who does he think he is? I have feelings too! Why do I put up with this?! Because I need a job and I have to get my intern hours to graduate, that's why. Oh, Serena don't do this to yourself…you'll look back years from now and laugh.'_ I thought as I walked into the parking garage, the warm breeze making me feel a little more at ease.

----

I walked up the steps to the townhouse. It was absolutely gorgeous. I suppose for being the Hampton's it should be. It's not like I could afford to live here, I can barely afford rent in the city! As I got closer to the door, I could hear loud music banging from inside. I grabbed the knocker and banged gently at first.

Nothing.

I grabbed it again and banged a little harder.

Nothing…

I made a fist and started banging. I just wanted to drop off this stupid suit and go. I hated my life and boss right now and I certainly didn't want to be standing on his doorstep.

"Can I help you?" A dark haired man finally answered.

His shirt was off and his pants riding a little low and I couldn't help but gasp and look him up and down. He was right out of a Calvin Klein magazine, except I don't think he was gay. If he was, what a waste! His dark hair fell a little over his eyes …ohhhhhh his deep blue eyes. I could have melted right on his door step. The fantasies I was having at the moment even made me blush!

"Are you going to keep undressing me with your eyes and fucking me in your mind or can I help you?" He spoke huskily.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?" I asked shocked by what he just said.

This was definitely without a doubt Mr. Shield's son.

"I _know_ you heard me. Its ok, I understand. It must be hard to get a date let alone talk to a guy who didn't work at McDonald's." He smiled arrogantly.

"I've come to drop a suit a off to Mr. Shields's son. I'm his intern, Serena." I smiled pleasantly though I know it was noticeably fake.

"I know who you are. Mr. Shield's called and warned me to hide the fridge because you were stopping by."

I threw the suit at him and stormed away. I could feel tears burning in my eyes. I would not let him get the best of me. I stomped my way down the stairs, my heel slamming down on the pavement with every step.

"If you crack the cement, I'm calling my lawyer!" He laughed before he slammed the door shut.

I opened the door to my Jeep and sat there. I tried to swallow the lump in my throat but I practically choked. I ended up just letting it out, just bawling my heart out right there in front of my boss's house.

"Don't do this Serena. It's not worth it." I kept telling myself between sobs.

I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths. I was through with this. Through with the tears and abuse, the fat jokes and everything else Mr. Shields had ever made me feel. I reached into my purse and grabbed my cell phone. Quickly I dialed the numbers and held my breath.

"Lover's Anonymous can I help you?" I heard a sweet female voice answer the phone.

"Hello, I read your ad in the paper and thought maybe you could…" I started to say.

"Help you?" She finished for me.

"Yes. Exactly."

"Come by our office tomorrow at 7 p.m. sharp. Don't be late."

"Where are you located?" I asked hurriedly.

"Don't worry about that now." Was all she said before she hung up.

I ended the call and flipped my phone shut and finally started my car. I hope whoever the guy was, Mr. Shields Jr. or not didn't notice I was sitting outside his house for twenty minutes. I wiped the remainder of tears away and drove away back into the city.

-----

I lay in bed that night. I couldn't sleep. I was so excited! The thought of actually taking control of my life and being happy was too overwhelming for me to even consider sleeping. I know I'd pay for it tomorrow but it was worth it. I wasn't going to let Mr. Shields get to me or anything else for that matter. Everything was going to work for me. It had to. I leaned over and scratched Luna's little silky black head and smiled to myself. I closed my eyes and pictured myself with the man of my dreams. That was the first time in a long time I felt happy and uninhibited.

-----

I woke feeling refreshed, surprisingly, considering I only slept 4 hours. I sprung out of bed humming to myself a happy little tune as I skipped to the bathroom and turned the shower on. Today was the beginning of the rest of my life.

I spent extra time on myself. I curled my hair and actually took my time with putting my make-up on. I even plucked my eyebrows and shaved my legs! I searched my closet for the sexiest outfit I could find. A black and pink polka-dot knee length A-line dress and a pink cardigan. I grabbed the strappy black sandals from the back of the closet and put them on, grabbed my black handbag and shouted "Wish me luck!" to Luna as I rushed out the door.

------

"Tanelian, my office, now."

"Yes, sir." I answered sweetly into the speaker.

I got up from my chair and walked into the office smiling.

"What are you so happy about, finally get laid?" Mr. Shields grumbled from his desk.

For a man in his late forties, he looked like he was over 60, between the cigars and constant frowning.

"No sir it's just going to be a good day. What did you call for?" I replied as I inched towards his desk.

"These need filing, call these people and let them know their court dates and set up a 12 p.m. lunch date with Judge Harrington at Cosi."

"Right away sir."

I took the files and started to walk out of the office when I heard him say, "You look nice today, Tanelian. You should dress like that more often."

I gushed inward and walked out of the office and back to my desk.

"Serena, this is for you. It came first class." Mina said as she walked towards my desk, an envelope in hand.

"Is it from a boyfriend?"

"No." I answered reaching for the mail.

"Secret admirer?" She giggled as I opened it.

"I don't know."

I pulled a red piece of paper out and unfolded it. In black, scrolly print it read:

_45__th__ West 32__nd__ Street_

_7 p.m., 3__rd__ floor_

_Don't be late_

"Well, what is it?" Mina shrieked in anticipation.

"It's nothing. I just have an appointment this evening."

"With who?!"

Before I could say anything, Mr. Shields's head popped out of the door.

"Mina, my office…now."

Mina gave me a worried look and slowly started her descent into the office of doom.

-----

Seven couldn't come quick enough. I stayed late at work and kept myself busy playing Solitaire on my computer until 6:40. I grabbed my stuff, said good night to the Janitor and walked into the parking garage and with shaking hands, started the car and drove out into the city, looking at the sunset casting golden hues across my way.

-----

I stopped in front of a large, gray building.

'_This is it Serena. This is the beginning of your new life. Don't mess things up.'_

I inhaled deeply and opened the glass doors. The hall was dimly lit. The walls were dark red with black furniture in the lobby and pictures of people in compromising positions on the wall. It felt like I had walked into a home for concubines. I pushed the button for the elevator.

I stepped on and listened to the quiet, sensual music playing and began thinking 'Dear God what have I gotten myself into!'

When the doors opened, I was greeted by a gorgeous woman with dark raven hair and amethyst eyes. She had a body like Mina's and I hated her already.

"Welcome. You must be here for a 7 p.m. appointment." She said sweetly. She tossed her long hair over bare shoulder, the tresses blending in with her black corset.

"Yes, I'm Serena. Serena Tanelian."

"Hello Serena. I'm Raye. Let's get you into a room and talk."

How she could walk in those heels without falling or have a butt cheek fall out of that red leather mini-skirt was beyond me.

Everything was dark and sensual like the lobby, dark red walls, black carpets, risqué pictures. I looked around and noticed several rooms, all with their doors closed. I thought I heard moans but I couldn't be sure. I was beginning to regret coming here. I was beginning to think that I wouldn't make it out of here alive.

"Come in here and get comfortable." Raye said as she opened a door.

I walked in and hesitantly sat on the large bed. I gripped the satin sheets in my hands tightly and strained to see Raye in the dim light.

"I'm beginning to think I made a mistake. I think I should go." I choked out shakily.

"Serena, relax. Don't be nervous. We help people like you. Please, just meet with a colleague of mine and let us do a free consultation with you. If you're not interested then you can leave and forget all about this. Ok?" Raye sat down beside me and placed her hands on mine.

"Ok…" I whispered meekly.

"My consultant and therapist will be here in a moment to speak with you."

She got up and closed the door behind her, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I tried to locate all available exits just incase someone in a mask, leather and chains tried to kill me. The door opened abruptly and I jumped to my feet. I nearly fell over with a heart attack when I saw who stood before.

"You…" I shrieked before I was pushed back on the bed.

-------

Well thanks for the reviews!! You're so sweet! Seriously, keep them coming cause they make me want to write. I've been obsessed with checking my e-mail and stats. So please, send me your opinion/love and I will love you forever! Until next time, happy reading!


	3. Chapter 3

"You..." I shrieked before two strong arms pushed back on the bed.

"Hello again, Serena." He whispered in my ear, his strong body hovering over me.

"This is not happening. This is can't be happening. I'm having a nightmare. I'll wake up soon and laugh." I started to hyperventilate.

"Oh trust me, this is all real. This isn't a dream." He gently nibbled on my ear.

"What are you doing?!" I shrieked again when I felt his hand on my thigh.

"I'm going to pleasure you like you've never been pleasured before."

"I don't even know your name!" I stood up and pushed him away.

"It's Darien."

He started to corner me into the wall and I had no where to run. So I did the only thing a girl could do. Cry…and grab a statue of some naked person off the night table.

"Why are you crying?" He asked kind of annoyed.

"Because you're going to rape and kill me. I mean look at you, the leather pants and metal studded belt. You're probably into S & M or something. I'm not like that! I want to go home. Now…" I sobbed.

"You twit. I'm not going to kill you! This is my job. I'm a sex therapist. I have sex with women like you and let them live out their wildest fantasies. It boosts their self esteem and makes me extremely rich. Isn't that what you came here for?" He sat on the bed, his arms crossed across his broad, bare chest. If I wasn't so terrified (and maybe if he had bought me dinner first!) I might have been interested in having sex!

"No! Yes! Maybe! I don't know! I read the ad in the paper and it said that you would help me with my love life and make me feel happy. That's what I wanted. Not to pay you for sex and feel a false sense of happiness for 5 minutes." I choked out.

"Look, Serena, that's what this company is. We help men and women in your position who start off feeling like you do. We help them with talking, sex therapy, and even a brief friendship. When we're done, the people who thought they were so ugly and disgusting and didn't deserve anything better then the Burger King guy, those people are now out in the world finding true happiness. And for your information, when you're with me it lasts longer then 5 minutes!" He spoke gently.

"Well if you know how to treat women right, then why did you say all those nasty hurtful things to me when I dropped off your suit?"

"If I apologize will you put down that stupid statue and sit down so we can talk?"

"I guess." I whispered as I gently put the statue back.

"Serena, I'm sorry for what I said about you. I was wrong. There is no excuse or reason that I could give you that would make up for the hurt I caused. Do you forgive me?"

"You're really good at what you do. If I didn't already have a first impression of you, I'd probably believe you. But I forgive you all the same." I sighed as I sat down on the bed.

"Are you serious about changing your life, Serena?"

"Yes…I'm tired of having my cat as my only friend and I'm tired of assholes like you making me feel stupid and worthless because I'm not a size 2."

"I'll help you. On the side. Think of it as an "I'm sorry" gift. I won't charge you either since you work for my dad. This will be our little secret."

"Alright."

I stood up to leave but I felt a firm grasp around my wrist.

"I'll be at your place tomorrow at 7." Darien said sweetly.

"Alright. That will give me enough time to run my errands and have dinner before you come over."

"No, Serena. 7 a.m."

"What?! I'm not awake before 10:30 unless I'm at work. Tomorrow's Saturday, Darien!" I whined.

"Do you want my help or not?"

"Fine…" I mumbled under my breath.

"What?"

"I said fine. But don't expect me to be in a good mood."

"Leave your address with my assistant Raye on your way out."

I gave a faint smile and walked out of the room an down the hall towards the elevators.

"What did you decide, Serena?" Raye asked me before I pushed the down the button.

"I've decided that maybe your services offered _here_ may not be the best idea for me. However, one of your colleagues offered to help me at my home. He said to leave my address with you."

"Well here. Write it down and I'll be sure to give it to him." Raye said as he handed me a pad of post-it notes in the shape of penises.

Reluctantly I took the pad and pen and scribble down my contact information.

"Thank you and hopefully everything works out for you. Thanks for stopping in Serena."

"Have a pleasant night." I smiled as I stepped on the elevator.

I took a sigh of relief when the doors closed and I started to move down. I all but ran out of that building and into my car.

First thing I did was lock the doors and look around to make sure no one was in my backseat.

"Breathe, Serena. Just breathe. It's all over…" I sighed as I rested my head on the back of the seat.

------

"Wake up, sunshine."

I thought I was dreaming…until I felt a hands grabbing hold of my body.

"What are you doing??!?!" I screamed as I jumped out of bed.

"It's time to get up, Serena. We have a big day ahead of us." Darien said calmly as he sipped on a cup of coffee.

"How did you get in here?!"

"It's amazing what good looks and a little charm will do to a landlady."

I laid back down on the bed, my hands covering my face.

"Time to get up. Today is the first day to happiness." Darien said as he pulled the covers off me.

"God, just kill me. What did I do to deserve this?" I groaned in frustration.

"Serena, get your ass out of bed. We have lots to do." Darien said as he grabbed my hands off my face and pulled to my feet.

"Is it too late to change my mind?"

"Yes, it is. You are stuck with me until the end."

"I'm going to take a shower. Don't steal anything."

"You might want to wait on the shower."

"Why? Why can't I take a shower, Darien?!" I asked totally annoyed and completely frustrated.

"Because we're going to go exercise. No sense in washing twice. Now get some comfortable work out clothes on and let's go."

"You're joking right?"

"Does it look like it?"

I look at him and noticed he had on basketball shorts, t-shirt and running shoes. No, the ass was not joking.

"This is stupid. God why did I have to end up with you, of all people, as my therapist or nymph or whatever you are." I grumbled as I grabbed a pair of black cotton capri's, pink NYU Law School tee and my Nike cross trainers.

"Serena, do me a favor?" Darien whispered as he grabbed me from behind and tickled my ear with his breath.

He pressed his body into mine which, for some reason, really turned me on. I mean, he was hot as Hell and this was the closest I had been with a man since Prom night.

My head fell back against his chest as his arms entwined around my chest and stomach.

"What?" I gulped.

"Stop your bitching."

He let me go and I stormed into the bathroom, got dressed, brushed my teeth and put my hair into a ponytail.

------

"How do you feel?" He asked as I all but passed out on the couch in my living room.

"Go to Hell…" I moaned.

Every bone, every muscle hurt like I had just run the Boston Marathon…and I only jogged around the block.

"Oh, Serena you say such things now but when this is over you'll be so grateful and happy."

"Darien, leave me alone. I'm hot, sweaty, hungry, sore, thi-"

"Oh, poor Serena. Let me play the world's smallest violin." He mimicked as he sat on the chair across from me.

"Go take a shower and get ready. I'll be back in an hour to take you to breakfast and start our day."

"Fine…" I rolled off the couch.

"Darien, you do know you are not coming in the shower with me, right?"

"Yeah…"

"Then why are you following me?"

"I'm going to pick out your outfit. Your bathroom is connected to your bedroom so I'm going to be following you."

"I am perfectly capable of picking out my own clothes."

"Really, that's why you look like you're a 60 year old spinster. I'm picking out your outfit. I want you to do your hair and spend time on your make- up. Like you did last night. You were hot yesterday."

"Darien, I know what your job is but please don't tell me things like that if you don't mean it. You make me feel worse because I know it's a lie."

"Serena, I'm not lying. Between the first time I saw you in your Lane Bryant stretch pants and last night, you were a completely different person."

What could I say to that!? I had a gorgeous man telling me _I_ was gorgeous. I walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind me, all the while grinning from ear to ear.

------

"You have to come out of there sometime!"

"No, Darien! I look like a $2 hooker!"

"Serena, come out!"

"NO!"

"I'll come in there and drag you out myself!"

Knowing he probably would, I opened the door and stepped out. That was the last time I was letting him pick out my outfit!

"You look good, Serena."

"I'm not going out in public like this."

"What's wrong with it? Remember this all came from your closet."

"I like the pink skirt, I never wear it because I have thick calves and cankles and it only comes to right above my knees. The black top is cute too…if it wasn't a total cleavage shirt. I'm too self conscience for this!"

"Serena, you look gorgeous. Put your shoes on and let's go."

"How come you get to wear jeans and I can't?" I whined.

"Because I'm a guy. Guys don't wear skirts. Besides, you need to flaunt what you've got. Show some confidence. Guys love that in a woman."

I sighed as I grabbed my black sandals and purse. I couldn't believe I was going to be seen in public like this. I grabbed my sunglasses from the kitchen counter and waited anxiously by the door for Darien.

"Are you ready?"

"God, you are impatient. You're going to be more difficult to work with then I thought."

"Bite the fattest part of my ass, Darien. This is all your fault. Let's go."

------

"What can I get for you today?" The cute little brunette waitress asked.

"Well, _Lita_, I will have an order of bacon, two eggs over easy, an order of pancakes and a large orange juice."

"Thank you." She said as he tossed her ponytail over her shoulder. Her green eyes twinkled when she looked at Darien. Her small hips swayed back and forth slowly as she wrote down his order. God, I really hated her too.

"And for you?" She asked me.

"I'll have-"

"She'll have a two egg omlette, whites only, with all the veggies you have, light on the cheese, and an unsweetened iced tea with lemon." Darien cut me off.

"Very good, I'll be back shortly."

"Why did you order for me? That's not even what I wanted!" I growled.

"Serena, you have yet to learn that as of today I'm in charge. I'm in charge of your body and your mind."

"You have got to be kidding me!" I held my head in hands and took a few deep breaths to calm myself. I wanted to kill Darien Shields.

"Let's make a deal, Serena."

"What kind of deal?"

"You devote yourself to me for six months. Just six months from now. That's around Christmas time that this will be over. If I help you get yourself on track and who knows, maybe even get you to have sex, I'll convince my father to give you a raise .If you want to end it now, no hard feelings, I'll walk out of your life forever and you'll never hear from me again. What's the worst that could happen? You lose a little weight, love yourself, get a raise, and maybe even score with a guy who didn't look like he stuck his head in a tub full of fry grease. What do you say?"

Hmm…not a bad arrangement. I could stand to lose a few pounds and I could always use the extra money. What is the worst that could happen?

"Alright Darien. You have yourself a deal. Six months. That's it. And you have to swear to me that you will convince your father to give me a raise."

"Deal. Oh and Serena?"

"Yes?"

"We will be having sex at some point in time. It's how I work things. Hot, passionate, orgasmic sex."

"WHAT?!"

And that was when I signed my soul to the Devil himself, Darien Shields.

------

We went out shopping that afternoon to a few malls. He had an _awesome_ car. A black Prowler convertible. I would have killed to have a car like this. I'll just go into my Swiss bank account and take out $85,000 and buy one…if I had a Swiss bank account and $85,000.

"Try this on."

"Darien, that is not my style."

"Serena, remember you gave yourself to me. You're mine for the next six months. Now try it on."

I stomped my feet as I took the stupid red dress from his hands and stormed into the fitting room.

"Where would I go to wear this?"

"It doesn't matter. Try it on and stop whining."

"Darien I couldn't even afford this! It's almost $1,000! That's a paycheck for me!"

"I'm buying it so there's nothing to worry about. Stop whining and _try it on!_"

I pulled the straps over my shoulders and zipped the back up. It was a pretty gown, fire engine red with an empire waist and a slit up the side. I loved the little train in the back of it.

"I'm coming out…"

I stepped out of the dressing room and awaited criticism from Darien that I look like an apple, but instead he smiled.

"You look gorgeous. We're taking it."

"Darien, I can't let you spend this much money on me when I just met you. And when I have nowhere to wear it!"

"Well Serena it just so happens that my father is having a little dinner party tonight. I'd like it if you were my date tonight."

Did he just ask me out?! What do I say!? This has never happened before! Well, not I at least ten years.

"Darien, are you screwing with me?" I asked as I stepped out of the dressing room, the dress in my hands.

"Not at all. What do you think?"

"Wouldn't it be weird for me to show up at my boss's house on a Saturday night with his son?"

"No. He probably wouldn't even notice we're there. This is your opportunity Serena to go out and mingle and make friends."

"Alright but if I'm not having a good time, will you take me home?"

"I promise."

And that's what brings me to my current predicament. I'm going out on a date…sorta…with my "sex therapist" to my boss's house. Oh, Serena what have you gotten yourself into? I'm going to need to stop on the way home and grab a bottle of scotch.

-----

Oh, thank you for all the marvelous reviews! You're awesome! I want to hug all of you, but I won't! Again, the more reviews I get, the more excited I get about having the next chapter out! Until next time, happy reading!


	4. Chapter 4

Ok, so how does one prepare to go to a dinner party at her boss's house with her boss's son as a date? How!? I'm so nervous I think I might have an accident. I'm too young for Depends! Moving on, I finally put the dress on but I can't help but feel self conscious. I don't like my arms and I think it makes me look too busty. Would Darien be totally against me wearing a hoodie and jeans?

-------

"I'm coming!" I yell at the ass that was knocking obnoxiously on my door.

"Serena, you look gorgeous." Darien gushed as I opened the door to a bouquet of red roses and probably the most yummy sight (next to triple chocolate fudge brownie ice cream with caramel swirls)…Darien in a black tux. Oh God, I think I just had an orgasm.

"Well thank you Darien, you look nice too." I smiled sweetly.

"These are for you." He said as he handed me the bouquet.

"Thank you. That was very nice of you."

"It's part of my training for you."

Everything was going so well until he opened his damn mouth. He couldn't forget about our "arrangement" for tonight. What an ass. Way to ruin a perfectly good moment. But then again who was I to think that someone like him could want someone like me? Silly Serena, go and get your hopes up like that.

"I see. Well it's nice just the same."

"Are you ready?"

"Yeah, just let me feed Luna real quick and grab my purse."

------

We pulled up in front of the same townhouse in the Hampton's where I first met Darien. Little lights were twinkling around the garden in the front. Darien and I walked up the steps and into the house.

People were all over the place drinking, laughing and having a good time. How I longed to be like that…just stand around with a bunch of friends and sip on champagne as we talked about the weather, politics, the news…anything.

Darien and I walked into the living room where a large group of women stood next to the large stone fireplace. I could hear their fake, insincere laughs. It made me sick. I guess this is how the rich live…fake.

We walked out into the patio in the backyard. Darien mingled with a few old men and I stood behind him, my fingers twiddling with one another out of shear nervousness. We walked down the steps and into the backyard where a pianist was plunking on the keys and people listened intensively to each note that was played. Under the large white tent we saw Mr. Shields laughing obnoxiously and I felt my body cringe.

"Ah, Darien so glad you could make it!" Mr. Shields laughed. He was _so_ beyond wasted.

"Dad, I think you know Serena." Darien said as he pulled me closer.

"Hello Mr. Shields. You have such a lovely home, thank you for having me."

"Darien you should have warned me she was coming. I would have had the cook make more food." He laughed.

Not even with alcohol could the man be nice. I smiled my best smile and tried to laugh with them but inside I was dying.

"Very funny, sir. That was a good one. Darien, if you'll excuse me for a moment." I started to choke.

I walked as fast as I could away from Darien and his father. I didn't want either one to see me right now. Not at my weakest point.

'_Grow some balls, Serena! Tell that bastard off! Who does he think he is?! You are a guest and he has no right!'_ I kept thinking to myself but I knew no matter how many times I thought that, nothing would come of it. I'm too much of a pushover.

I walked out into the large marble foyer and headed towards the door. I heard Darien yelling my name above the crowd but I pretended like I didn't hear it. How cliché. I had already made it down the steps and out onto the sidewalk when Darien grabbed my arm.

"Let me go, Darien." I scolded.

"Serena, would you wait a moment?"

"No."

"I'm sorry for what he said. I really am. That wasn't cool. My dad can be a real asshole sometimes."

"Sometimes, Darien? How about all the time?!"

"Serena, would you please come back inside with me?"

"Why? So I can be the butt of all his stupid jokes?"

"Serena, you need to defend yourself. I can't do it for you. You have a voice, use it. Tell him that was inappropriate. Tell him he's an asshole! How can you expect people to give you respect when you don't even respect yourself?" He pleaded with me.

He was right. How could people respect me when I despised myself so much? Talk about an oxy moron.

"He's my boss, Darien. I can't tell him that or I won't have a job! I barely get by as it is!"

"Serena, part of your therapy is to learn how to stand up for yourself and to love yourself. Start tonight. Go tell him what you think. Let's go back inside…please?"

How could I say no to him? I rolled my eyes and sighed.

"Fine, but Darien if he's going to be doing this to me all night then I'm leaving. I don't care if I have to walk the thirty-seven miles back into the city."

"Serena I promised you I'd take you home if you weren't having a good time. But you have to give the evening a chance. Ok?"

"Ok."

I took his hand that was stretched out to me. We walked back into the house and I tried my best to think happy thoughts and keep smiling.

Every time I saw a waiter walk by with a tray of champagne I'd take one. I must've had like a million (well it seemed like it…realistically, it was more like 3. I don't hold my alcohol very well…).

Everyone sat down for dinner at the tables under the tent. Of course Darien and I got stuck sitting up front with his father. I guess after a few drinks, I didn't really care much about anything anymore.

"Thank you all for coming. I hope everyone here has a wonderful time. Please eat…before Serena here gets it all!" Mr. Shield's laughed. A few snickers were heard from the crowd but obviously no one else found it that funny either.

"May I have your attention for just another moment?" I stood up from my seat. "Mr. Shields, you have been such a pleasure to work with. I'm sure anyone here would say that having herpes is almost as pleasurable as spending five minutes in a room with you. So here's to you Mr. Shield's. May you feel as good as you make me feel on any given day at the office. Like a worthless piece of shit." I held my drink up in my hand and gulped it down quickly before staggering away towards the house.

I heard soft whispering from the other guests as I made my dramatic exit.

"Serena!"

I kept walking ignoring Darien.

"Serena, wait a second!" He yelled out of breath.

I stopped in front of the front door and turned around expecting to see him fuming after what I just said about his father. I was pleasantly surprised to see him smiling.

"Serena, that was incredible! You did it! You stood up for yourself!" He hugged me.

"It felt good. I mean it took a few drinks for me to loosen up but I did it!" I squeaked excitedly.

"You did wonderful."

"I wonder if I'll still have a job come Monday."

"You will. I don't think my father or anyone else for that matter will remember tonight."

"Darien, can we go?" I hiccupped.

"Absolutley."

--------

We went back to my apartment and ordered pizza. Well, Darien ordered pizza. I got a freakin'salad. Although, he did let me bring out the good stuff…the liquor and beer. After several hours of trying to play Scrabble, Poker and I'm not even sure what else, we collapsed on the floor in a drunken stupor.

"This ::hiccup:: was a fabulous idea ::hiccup:: Darien."

"Yeah. Dressed up in a tux and evening gown, sitting on your apartment floor and getting drunk. Can't get much better then this." Darien said as he leaned back on my couch. Luna curled up in his lap and purred softly.

"Thanks for keeping my company tonight. It means a lot."

"No problem, Serena. I had a good time. This is probably one of the funnest nights I've had with a client."

"You should probably get home to your wife." I said. Of course I was prying to see if you was taken without coming right out and saying it.

"I'm not married."

"Ok, well I'm sure your girlfriend is probably worried."

"Don't have one of those either. I'm single Serena if that's what you're trying to fish out." He chuckled.

"I wasn't trying to get anything out of you! I was just saying whoever is at home waiting for you must be worried. It's almost two in the morning."

"I don't have anyone to go home to. Just me." He said as he closed his eyes.

"Don't you live with your dad?"

"Hell no!" he laughed at me.

"When I dropped off your suit the first time I met you, you were at the townhouse."

"I was at his house because my shower broke and I had to get ready for work. You caught me as I was getting ready. I live about ten minutes away from here actually."

"Oh. Well you should probably be getting ready to go soon."

"Are you kicking me out?"

"What? No! I'm just saying that it's late and we're drunk and you should sleep."

"I suppose you're right." He said as he stood to his feet.

I got up on my feet too and followed him to the door. Nothing harder then having tree trunks for legs and trying to get up off the floor in an evening gown.

"Thanks for a good time tonight." I said sweetly.

"No problem. You made it memorable."

"Well, I guess I'll be seeing you tomorrow at 7 for another jog?"

"Yeah. I'll be here bright and early so be ready this time."

"Good night." I said.

It must have been the alcohol giving me these hypothetical balls throughout the night because I reached up and kissed his cheek. My cheeks turned a bright shade of red after realizing (sorta) what I had just done. Darien leaned down and grabbed my lips in his. Oh my God I think I have just died and had an orgasm all at once. What a good kisser! If I wasn't so drunk I'd probably stop his hand from grabbing my boob. Then again, maybe not…

"Darien?" I moaned in between heated kisses.

"Yeah?"

"We need to stop." I tried to say.

"Why?"

"I'm going to be sick…"

I pulled myself away and clutched my hand over my mouth and ran off towards my bathroom. What a way to ruin what could have been the first time I had sex in a _long_ time.

"You ok, Serena?" I heard a soft knock at the door.

"No…" I moaned in between heaves.

"Want me to get you something? A turkey sandwich?"

Just the thought of food made me vomit more.

"Darien please don't mention food."

"Sorry. Let me go and get you some Vernor's."

I threw my arms and head into the sink. The cold tile made me feel a little better. With one eye open I turned on the cold water and rinsed my mouth out. Nothing tastes worst then regurgitated romaine lettuce.

I stood up and walked out of the bathroom and collapsed on my bed. I didn't even bother to get out of that stupid dress.

"Here's some tea. You didn't have any Vernor's." Darien said as he brought me a hot mug.

"Thanks." I groaned as I tried to sit up.

"Want me to stay tonight?" He asked suddenly.

"Ummm, you only met me but a few days ago. How do you know I won't like kill you or something while you're sleeping? Or what if you try to kill me?!"

"Serena, I won't try to kill you and you're too big of a baby to try and kill me. Besides, you were just ready to have sex with me just a few minute's ago. There has to be a little trust."

"Darien, people have meaningless sex all the time with complete strangers. I'm not one of those people. It just so happens alcohol makes me promiscuous. But that is a conversation I'm not ready to start right now."

"What do you want?" He asked me.

What do I want? No one's ever asked me that. I don't think anyone's every cared to ask me.

"I want to be happy. I want someone who wants me in return and loves me more then life itself. I want someone who can get past the fact that I'm not a size 2 super model but I'm still beautiful. I want to be happy at work and be successful at my career. But more then anything, aside from all those things, I want to love myself. I want to respect myself and when I look in the mirror, I want to say "You look beautiful, Serena." That's what I want."

Darien looked at me completely dumbfounded. He sat on the edge of the bed next to me and opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but quickly shut it again. I turned over on my side, my back towards him.

"Well Serena. Isn't that what every girl wants? To love herself and for someone to love her unconditionally? There's nothing wrong with that and you will have it, I promise. That's what my job is; I bring women happiness. But to honest Serena, I was actually asking what you wanted to do with me tonight? Did you want me to go?"

I felt like a complete idiot. Why would I think that's what he wanted to hear? Why would he care about 'what I wanted'?

"I don't care, Darien. Do what you want. I'll be asleep anyway so it's not like I'd know the difference. If you do leave, lock the door on your way out. If you stay there are extra pillows and a blanket in the hall closet."

"Well, if you won't know the difference then I'll say good night."

Darien leaned down and gave me a gentle kiss good night on my cheek and turned off the light before he walked out, closing the door behind him.

------

"Ohhhh…" I groaned as I grabbed my head.

"Time to get up. It's 6:45." Darien said.

"I had a rough night/early morning. Please, can I take a rain check today?"

"No. You're going to get out of bed and get ready for our jog. I'll go get some coffee ready."

"God, I hate you…"

I cursed under my breath and rolled out of bed and wandered into the bathroom with my eyes half shut.

"Serena?"

"Darien, can't I take a pee in peace?"

"Of course you can. Just weigh yourself when you're done."

I was not in the mood to deal with him right now. When I was done taking my peaceful piss, I stood on the scale and closed my eyes as I awaited the horrific number it would tell me…209.

Not too bad. Between the last two days of stress and healthy eating, I lost three pounds. Wahoo!!!

"How much do you weigh?" Darien asked as he ate a bowl of cereal.

"Please, help yourself to my food." I said sarcastically as I grabbed something comfortable out my closet.

"Thank you. But how much do you weigh?" Darien smirked.

"180."

"You're lying."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are. I'm going to guess about 210."

"209." I mumbled beneath my breath.

"What was that?" He grinned.

"209. Happy?"

"See? That wasn't so hard. Now let's go."

"How come you get breakfast and I don't?" I whined as I tied my shoe.

"Because you burn more calories if you workout on an empty stomach. Besides we're only going for one block Serena. It's not like you're going to be without food for hours!"

I wanted to smack him. I was tired, hungry and cranky. Why did he have to be so annoying?!

"Let's go…"

"Serena, you're awfully cranky."

"Shut up Darien."

I heard him laugh as we walked out the door into the warm spring air.

-----

"I'm proud of you. You made it a whole block and a half today." Darien said as I collapsed on the couch.

"Can I please have some food now?'

"Go get ready and we'll talk about breakfast."

"You suck…" I groaned as I slowly pulled myself off the couch.

"My, my. Someone's sure not a morning person." He said as he sat on the chair next to the couch.

"No, I'm not. Especially when I've only had a few hours of sleep and some asshole wakes me up to get my fat ass running."

"I'm not even going to touch that. Juts remember how you _think_ about yourself, is how you _see _yourself. I'm going to go get ready. I'll be back in about an hour to get you."

-------

"No."

"What do you mean no?!"

"I will not be seen in public with you wearing that."

"Darien, what's wrong with what I'm wearing?"

"You look ridiculous. It looks like something Roseanne would wear."

"You're rude!"

"Serena, I won't lie to you. The ripped straight legged jeans, ugly oversized multi colored tunic and flip flops need to go. Throw them out."

"No! I've had these jeans since my senior year of high school."

"It shows. Go change. Now."

"Darien, it's no up to you what I get to wear!"

"It is if you want food."

That was so cruel…

"Fine. You win this time…" I grumbled as I searched my closet for something else.

"Wear this." He said as he grabbed something from the back of my closet.

"Darien, typically if clothes are in the _back_ of the closet, they're there for a reason. The back of the closet is a forbidden area. It's dark and cold back there…things go back there never to see the light of day again."

"Serena, what did you smoke and can I have some?" He giggled.

"Oh screw off, Darien." I grumbled as I took the garment out of his hands. "I don't wear this for a reason. I look like a dead testicle…round and black." I threw the black sundress back at him.

"Serena put it on. After breakfast, we're going shopping. I'm not going to let you walk around like the lesbian lover of Roseanne."

So after several deep sighs, I took the garment and went into the bathroom and transformed from comfy clothes, into the gonad of a corpse…


	5. Chapter 5

Darien grabbed me and threw me down on the table, sending heated kisses up and down my neck. He nibbled a little on my ear as his hand started to grab me in places every girl wished to be touched. I grabbed his head and pulled him close to me, my lips barely brushing his.

"I want you, Serena." He panted.

"I know. I want you too." I purred as my hands reached around to grab that delicious butt of his.

"Take me right now, Darien!" I screamed.

"Serena? Hello?"

"Hmm? What?" I asked as I shook my head clear of my daydream. I laid my head back on the seat of his car as the wind whipped my hair all around my face. The open air from having the top down was refreshing.

"Where do you want me to take you?" He asked slyly, quickly taking his eyes off the road.

Only two words could describe this situation…oh shit.

"I want you to take me to breakfast. Where else would I want you to take me?" I said sarcastically desperately trying to save my ass.

"Oh, I can think of a few places. The kitchen counter comes to mind." He giggled.

"You're a perv, Darien! What makes you think I'd want to have sex with you?" I scoffed.

"Oh, well last night gave me a pretty good idea."

"We were drunk. I told you I can't handle my alcohol and you took advantage of me anyway. I should press charges for attempted rape."

"Serena, I hate to be the barer of bad news but you technically can't rape the willing. It's a law. Sorry."

"Who said I was willing?! I wasn't willing!"

"Really? That's why you let me grope you?"

"Darien, I told you I was drunk. You are such a fu-"

"We're here." He smiled cutting me off.

He pulled the car into the parking spot and put it in park. I grabbed my purse and unbuckled my seatbelt. Darien's cell phone started ringing as soon as we came to a stop.

"I'll be right there, Serena. I have to take this." He said as he flipped his phone open and in sat the car.

I walked onto the sidewalk and marched my way towards the door of the nice little place we went to yesterday.

I took Darien's advice and tried to walk with confidence even though I wore that horrid black dress.

As I leaned against the wall, I saw the young waitress from yesterday smoking out in the parking lot. Her curly walnut ponytail swaying back and forth from the light breeze.

I turned my head back towards Darien who was lost in his world. Two young, attractive men walking towards the entrance where I was standing and I could tell they arrogant asses; just by the way they walked or laughed.

I grabbed my purse tighter and crossed my arms over my chest protectively.

"Looks like we can't eat _here_ today." A guy with bleached blonde hair said to his friend. He straightened out his tie and adjusted his gray sports coat.

"Why?" His friend said. He ran a hand over his brown spiky hair and checked himself out in the window of a nearby car.

"Cause pork pot here probably at the place clean." The real-life Ken doll laughed.

I felt a lump growing in my throat. Why did I always cry? Why couldn't I defend myself like I did last night? Aside from the fact I had no alcohol to give me the brass balls I so desperately wanted right now, there was no other logical explanation.

"Awww, little Miss Piggy gonna cry?" they snickered at me.

"Is there a problem here, Serena?" Darien said as he walked to where I was.

"Is this _your_ fat bitch?"

"Excuse me?" Darien said defensively.

"It's ok Darien. Let's just go." I said meekly. I quickly wiped away a tear.

"No, no it's not ok. What did you say about my girlfriend?" Darien asked again.

Girlfriend? What was he talking about? Did I say yes to something last night that I don't remember…not that I'm complaining…after all, I'd be stupid _not_ to say yes to being in a relationship with Darien Shields!

"How could you bang that? She has more rolls then a bread factory!" The blonde sneered.

"Well if you can't find a hole, fuck a roll!" The other said. Both broke out into bursts of laughter.

Out of no where I saw a fist come smack down on the blonde's nose.

"What the hell?! You bitch!" He yelled as he grabbed his bleeding face.

"Get the hell away from here before I _really_ get pissed!" The brunette yelled back.

"You fucking bitch! I'll have you fired!" He yelled again as the two walked away towards their red sports car.

"You can't fire me! I _own_ the place, asshole!"

"Wow, you sure can pack a punch." Darien laughed.

"Are you alright?" She asked me.

"Yes. Thank you."

"No problem. They deserved it. You weren't the only one they've started trouble with. I've wanted to do that for a long time. I'm Lita by the way." She held her hand out.

"Hi. I'm Serena." My shaking hand grabbed hers. I thought she damn near broke it!

"I'm Darien." Darien extended his hand.

"Are you gay?" She asked sincerely.

I couldn't help but laugh. Funny how not even a week ago I thought the same thing.

"Umm, no. Do you always ask people you just met their sexual preference?"

"No, just the one's I think are gay. I like to know if my "gay-dar" is working. Come inside and get some breakfast. It's on the house." She said as she opened the door.

"Thank you." I said.

Darien shuffled in after me, grumbling under his breath about Lita's comment.

"I don't look gay…" I heard him whisper. What a baby!

"Serena, if it means anything, I think you're beautiful." Lita smiled.

I felt the lump again.

-------

Darien and I had a wonderful breakfast with Lita, though I only picked at my food. I wish I had half the guts she does. I would die to have her confidence…her charisma…hell, even her body! After the incident earlier, Darien didn't say a word to me. The car ride towards the mall was long and silent.

"I don't feel like going shopping." I said quietly.

"Why not?" Darien answered gently.

"I just don't feel like it. I'd rather go home if you don't mind."

"Serena, don't let what happened earlier get you down. Those guys were just a bunch of punks. If Lita wouldn't have thrown the first punch, I would've."

"It doesn't matter. What's said is said. Everything's over with so please, just take me home."

"No."

"Why not? Please Darien just take me home." I started to cry.

I turned my head away from him and covered my flooded eyes with my hand. Why couldn't he just understand I didn't want to go out? I bet he never had anything like that!

At worst, he probably had to defend himself with all the women drooling at his feet. I'd love nothing more then a bunch of guys looking at me like I see beautiful women look at Darien. I felt the car slow down and roll to a stop.

"Why did you pull over?" I sniffled.

"Because we need to talk."

"No we don't. Just take me home and you won't have to say anything to me. You probably think I'm a fat crybaby anyways."

"Serena listen to me. Do you really want to know what I think of you?"

"No, but you're probably going to tell me anyway." I whispered, still not letting the lump in my throat ease. I would _not _let him see me this way.

"I think you are beautiful. You really are. Sure you have a weight problem but so does half of America! You are working to overcome that! You lost three pounds in only a few days. You've been getting up the last few days to go jogging at 7 in the morning! I don't care what anyone else. I won't let you talk about my friend like that."

"Friend?" I asked surprised.

"Yes, friend. I know I introduced you as my girlfriend to those guys but that was only to defend you since you wouldn't defend yourself."

"Oh…" My heart sank. I could feel it falling further and further away from me, like a ship plunging into the dark depths of the ocean.

"Serena, I'm sorry if you thought it was anything more then a friendship. I didn't mean to play you like that. I'm just not one for committed relationships."

"No but you're one for making people feel terrible about themselves!" I snapped, catching Darien off guard.

"What?"

"You made me wear this horrible dress that I told you and I hated. Look what happened?! This is all your fault, Darien!" I sobbed.

I opened the door and started to walk on the shoulder of the interstate, cars zooming by me. I must've looked like a hooker with a death wish.

"Serena, get back here!"

"No! Just go away!"

I kept walking. I wanted to be by myself and as far away from people as I could. Especially Darien.

"Serena don't make me go and get you!" He yelled, his footsteps gaining on mine.

"Leave me alone." I sobbed.

Seriously, did I think I would be faster then him? We probably weigh the same but he's got over a foot on me…and he didn't have 20 pounds of boobs weighing him down! Darien grabbed me and held me close to him. I cried my heart out…in front of the hundreds of cars driving by us…and all over the front of his shit. 

"It's ok. Trust me, everything will be ok." He soothed. "Can we please go back to the car now before we become road kill?'

I nodded my head a little and walked back towards the car, Darien's arm tightly around my waist.

--------

"I'm not doing it, Darien."

"Yes you are. Take your dress off."

"No. This is stupid. I already know what's there and how it looks."

"Serena take your dress off or I'll cut it off."

"I'm not doing it with you here!"

"Serena, I've been with women before. I know what a female body looks like. Take the dress off."

I grumbled as I pulled the garment over my head. I knew how horrible I looked naked and I couldn't believe he was making me do this.

"Happy?" I scorned.

I shut my eyes with disgust. I was embarrassed Darien wanted to see me like this, nothing but a pink bra and pink granny panties covered me. I felt hands on my shoulders leading me somewhere.

"Open your eyes Serena." He whispered in my ear.

He pressed his body close to mine, my naked back resting against his hard chest. Slowly one eye opened and then the other, looking at the image in front of me.

"What do you see?" He asked gently as he walked away and stood in front of me, next to the mirror.

"I see…a sad, lonely woman who hates her body… and herself." I started to choke. I watched my tears fall away from eyes and down my cheeks. My hands reached out and gently touched the smooth surface of the glass.

"I see a scared little girl who needs help becoming the beautiful woman I know she is." Darien intercepted as he wiped a stray tear away. I had never felt so humiliated.

"Darien, please don't. I can't handle this right now." I cried harder.

"Yes you can, Serena. This is a major breakthrough. You must learn to _love_ yourself. Your body is not the enemy."

"I'm so tired Darien. I'm tired of people looking at me like I'm a freak. I'm tired of the laughs and jokes at my expense. I'm just…tired." I bawled.

I grabbed the blanket off the bed and wrapped it around my exposed body. I slid on the floor next to the bed and held my knees close to my chest, keeping my face hidden from him.

"Then it's time to do something about it. Serena, you've only been at this for a little less then a week. Don't give up. You have the opportunity to have what you want. It's right there in front of you."

"Please leave…"

"I'm not leaving you like this."

"Darien, I'm not asking. Leave…" I growled.

"Serena, why won't y-"

"Leave now!!!" I screamed.

He stood to his feet and walked away from me. I just covered my head again and continued crying.

-------

I woke up to the sound of my cell phone going off. I had cried myself to sleep on the floor where Darien left me only an hour earlier.

I groaned as I rose to my feet. The blanket fell off me and pooled at my feet. I was still half naked….

"I'm coming…" I spoke to no one in particular…well maybe Luna but I don't think she really cared.

"Hello?" I answered still half asleep.

"Hello, Serena?"

"Yes, who is this?"

"This is Raye, Darien's assistant. We met about a week ago."

"Yes, I remember you."

"Good. Darien told me how he's helping you at your workplace. He said everything has been going well so far."

"Yeah I guess…" If being humiliated in public in front a _gorgeous_ man meant everything was going well, I sure was in trouble.

"Well Darien said you were having kind of a bad morning. He called me and asked me to come take care of you."

"Take care of me?"

"Yes. It's about 2:30 right now. Would it be alright if I came over…let's say around 3?"

No. Absolutely not.

"Yeah, 3 would be fine."

"Great. See you then!"

God, I hated people who were so cheery. Come to think of it I hated a lot of people…or maybe just women in general. With much despair I walked back into my bedroom and grabbed my pink bunny pajama pants and an oversized t-shirt, through my hair into a bun and collapsed on the couch. At the moment, I didn't care _who_ or _what_ saw me.

------

"Hi Serena." Raye extended her arms and gave me a huge hug.

"Hi. Come in."

I swear that woman was asking for some body part to fall out! Her tight black top had a v cut all the way to her belly button! Ok, well maybe not _that_ low but close enough! I didn't like how she flaunted her bare stomach even though she did have a really cute belly ring! She swayed her hips in those low rider jeans just like Mina does. I'm not going to say I hate her…I just strongly dislike her.

"So tell me what happened today. I want to hear everything from beginning to end." She said as she set her purse down on the floor.

She tossed her raven hair over her shoulder and sat down, crossing her legs.

I'm sure Darien _had_ to be banging her. She was very beautiful…even though I strongly disliked her…

"Well, Darien picked out this stupid dress that I don't wear because I don't feel comfortable in it and simply put, I don't like it. We went to breakfast, some guys said some mean things about my weight, Darien brought me home because I was upset and that was it." I said quickly.

"I see. Well Darien gave me a little more detail then that and I just want to say Serena, I'm sorry. I'd have castrated those asses with butter knives."

"No worries. It doesn't matter anyway."

"Yes it does. Because of what two lousy people said, you want to give up. Don't let them win! You're so beautiful, Serena. Let Darien and I continue to help you, please."

"Raye, I appreciate your offer but no. I'm done. I'm bound to be one of those crazy cat ladies that yells at the kids for stepping on her lawn. That's my destiny and I've accepted it, embraced it."

"Are you ok with that?"

"I have to be. It's either a crazy cat lady or a bum and personally I don't do well without a bed or a shower."

"Well Serena, _I'm_ not ok with that. We're going shopping."

"Raye, I'm flattered you want to help change my future but-"

"_But_ nothing. Get ready, we're going shipping."

"If I just give you some money will you go away?"

"Serena, get your ass in there right now and change! We're going to the damn mall and I don't want to hear _any_ whining!" She scolded me.

I knew I had met my match. Without another word, I raced off of the couch, nearly tripping over Luna in the process and into the bedroom for what I could only imagine would be the beginning of my second job as a prostitute. With the way Raye dressed, there was no telling what I would come back in!

-------

"This is cute!" Raye giggled as she picked up…I think it was a shirt. It looked more like two triangles with some fringe and beads and a few straps.

I swear, between the leather pants she wanted to get me (which I thanked God and the cashier that they didn't make it in my size), or the studded thong, or the 4 inch leopard print paten leather stiletto's this woman wanted me to buy…I was doomed to work on the corner with a few quarter rolls for pay…if I was lucky.

"Umm Raye, no offense, I'm not sure if your style fits what I like."

"Oh…alright. Well, if you need me, I'll be around." She said quietly.

She can do the puppy dog face and droopy eyes better then Droopy Dog himself.

Swallowing my pride, I sweetly said "Raye, how about I pick out things and you tell me if they'll look ok. Is that ok?"

Her eyes lit up and she stood next to me like we were attached at the hip.

"Oh, Serena! This is so much fun! I haven't been out shopping with a friend in a long time!" She giggled.

"Raye, you just met me only a few days ago. How could I be your friend already?"

"Serena, I feel a very strong bond between us. I think we'll have a great friendship. Besides, it's not like I have a lot of friends to begin with." She said window shopping at the Coach store window.

"You're kidding. I'm sure you have lots of friends."

"No. I don't have time. Between work and my significant other…I don't have time for a huge social life."

"Well, I'm enjoying today too. Thanks for making me go."

-------

"You look gorgeous! You _have_ to get that dress!" Raye squealed.

"Where would I wear this to? What's up with you and Darien and formal gowns?!"

"Serena shut up. You always need a black dress. Turn around and let me see the rest of it."

I turned my back to her, my reflection greeting me as I made the 180 degree turn. I liked the dress, the square neck and little cap sleeves made me feel comfortable with my large chest and chubby arms. I really liked the little sequins underneath the bust and how it flowed to the ground. I suppose if I ever went to a wedding-…oh wait you have to have friends first…

"Raye, I'm not getting it. I like it but I need to be practical."

"Try on the suit, Miss Practical."

I went into the dressing room and tried to unzip the dress and got stuck. I tried to pull it over my head but it wouldn't move. My arms were tangled in the silky material and I couldn't breathe since it was squishing my nose and half a lip.

"Raye?"

No answer…

"Raye?"

"No answer…"

"Raye I need help!"

Still no answer.

There was no way to get out of this thing except to break the zipper. I stretched my arms out as far as they would go and I heard the "rrrrrip" of the fabric. Looks like I have to pay for it anyway…why me?

Why couldn't I have been a chest hair on Brad Pitt? Or a monkey? They're cute and people _like _them! Why did I have to be _me_?

I threw the stupid thing on the ground and grabbed the pink and black pinstripe pant suit off the little hook in the dressing room. I'm not even going to bother trying it on. If I get stuck in it, I'll have to pay for it anyway so I might as well take it home and make an ass out of myself.

I pulled my jeans back on and grabbed my tunic off the floor. I quickly pulled it over my head and pulled my tousled hair back in place.

After locating my flip flops I opened the door and walked to the register still looking for Raye. And that's when I saw it…Raye and Darien talking only 20 yards away, Darien's arms hugging a blonde. A tiny blonde…a pretty blonde…a-…Mina!

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Oh, how I love you all. All of your reviews made me so happy and giddy, I couldn't sleep! So please, pay homage to another SMFF author and leave a little love! For those who have been reading and reviewing, thank you. It's much appreciated! I'm thinking another chapter out this weekend. Until next chapter…happy reading!


	6. Chapter 6

Why do I care if he's with Mina? It's not like him and I are a couple! I mean, I've only known him a week! But I can't shake the jealous feelings. I want that to be my arms wrapped around his neck and his lips giving me a soft kiss on the cheek.

I want to stop looking at them so bad but it's like a car accident, I can't help but gawk.

Mina walked away with Raye. Where did Raye think she was going?! She was supposed to help me! Darien is coming towards me and even now I don't think I could hide the fact I have a breaking heart.

"Are you feeling better?" He asks sweetly.

"I'm fine." I smile at the cashier as I take the bag of clothes and walk right past him. Why does it bother me so much!

"Well, if you don't mind, I'd like to take you to dinner."

I stop dead in my tracks. I want to say yes but I know it'll only end up with me crying…alone…

"Thanks but no. I'd rather just stay home tonight by myself."

"Serena, I will not take no for an answer. Please?"

"Why did Raye leave?" I asked quickly changing the subject.

"She had somewhere she had to be right away. Stop avoiding the question. Please say yes."

"Why do you want to have dinner with me so bad?! Why does it matter?!"

I walked away quickly before he could say another word. I nearly ran over some guy walking into the building as I tried to escape. I hailed a cab and hopped in, not even seeing Darien behind me.

He probably just felt sorry for me. Poor Serena, had a bad day because some jerks told her what she already knew, let's make sure she has someone with her to make sure she doesn't choke on a ham sandwich!

I paid the driver and stepped out of the smelly little car and into the front doors of the apartment.

As much as I wanted to be by myself tonight, I still wished Darien would show up anyway. Why do I torment myself?!

"Hi Luna, did you miss me?" I cooed as I opened the door.

Throwing the things down on the floor, I picked her up and scratched her little head as she purred in my arms.

As long as I had Luna, I didn't need friends. Told you I was bound to be a crazy cat lady!

"What should we have for dinner? Wong's Take Out? I know what you want! You want some tuna."

I put Luna on the floor and walked into the kitchen to find her dinner when I was interrupted by a loud rapture at the door.

"Hi. Since you wouldn't come with _me_ to get dinner, I'm coming to you. How does Chinese sound?" Darien said as he held up a large brown paper bag.

I couldn't help but giggle.

"It sounds fine. Come in."

Darien smiled as he walked in and set the food down on the kitchen counter. Even after the way I've treated him, he still wants to come hang out with _me_. That has to say something about him, I guess.

"I was just about to order from there actually." I said casually as I looked for Luna's food.

"Well I took a guess at what you'd like and I came up with sweet and sour chicken. Is that right?" He asked as he put the food on plates.

"Yep. Besides, everyone loves sweet and sour chicken so you can't go wrong with it." I laughed nervously.

"Are you ready to sit down?"

I smiled and finished dumping the ground mush into the little ceramic kitty dish and walked over to the couch and sat on the floor across from Darien.

We started to eat in silence until he asked me "Serena, wanna play a game?"

"What kind of game?" I asked suspiciously.

"20 questions." He said as he bit into his egg roll.

"Umm, alright. You go first." I was still unsure whether this was a good idea or not.

"Alright, how much longer do you have until you finish school?"

"Another 6 months and then I can take the bar."

"Why are 28 and _now_ finishing school?"

"My dad left when I was little so it was just my mom and I. She was sick with breast cancer and when I was getting ready to go away to college right after high school graduation, she died. I took two years off to mourn, grieve, save money and move on. Then I took another year and half and went for a road trip throughout the US. So when I came to New York, I decided this was where I wanted to be. I applied to NYU and that's it." I answered truthfully. It was probably a _little_ more then what he wanted to hear.

"I'm sorry." He reached out and touched my hand.

"It's ok. Next question."

"When was your first kiss?"

Oh God, he had to ask that. This was going to be embarrassing.

"When I was 18."

"You had your first kiss at 18?!" He asked with shock.

"Yes, Darien! I wasn't the most popular girl, so let's rub it in!"

"Wow. Are you still a virgin?"

I should've seen that one coming…

"Practically. When I went to senior prom, I went with the nerdiest guy in the whole school. We both had braces and when he gave me my first kiss, they got stuck together. So after a few minutes, we broke apart and found a different way to make out without the metal getting tangled. Well, we went into the backseat of his dad's 89' electric blue Geo. We were going to have sex. After a few minutes of him just making funny grunting noises I finally asked, "Is it in yet?" Well he looked at me and snapped. "We've been doing it for fifteen minutes!" I was so embarrassed I asked him to take me home and we never spoke of that moment again. That was the last time I had sex. So after 10 years, I'm sure everything has gone back to normal. Not that it was ever 'not normal' to begin with, but you know what I mean."

Darien looked at me with a blank expression. Wow, he must've thought I was a complete and total loser (assuming he didn't already think that of me). I looked down at my plate and started playing with my food.

Then it came…the deep thunderous laugh. I looked up to see Darien's eyes welling up and his arms holding his stomach.

"Yeah, that's real funny isn't it?" I grumbled.

"I'm sorry Serena but that has got to be the funniest thing I've ever heard. You _never_ ask a guy that! Oh, you never cease to amaze me." He laughed more.

I amaze him? Really?! Or maybe it was my stupid stories that did the amazing.

"Ok, tell me about the first time you had sex!" I asked, my eyes glaring at him.

"I haven't reached 20 questions yet." He whined.

"I don't care! I want to hear it!"

"Well, in high school I had I huge crush on one of my sister's friends. She was _so_ hot. She was a cheerleader for the football team and I was the quarterback. After the game one night, I gave her ride home. Well, we stopped in front of her house and I started making out with her. After a few minutes, I tried to go under shirt when she stopped me. She said, "I'm sorry Darien, this isn't going to work." I felt terrible! I was embarrassed thinking it was something I did. She quickly added "It's not you. It's me." That's the worst line you could give a guy after you shatter his ego. So I said "Don't lie. If you don't like me, then we'll just forget about this." She says, "No Darien, it's not like that. I'm a lesbian." I thought she lying at first but then I saw her holding hands in the hallway with my sister. That's when I found out she was a lesbian too. So I must've been about 22 when I started this business and I had sex for the first time with a client."

I couldn't help but laugh.

"So let me get this straight…you tried to have sex with a girl who turned out to be lesbian; not just any lesbian though…your sister's girlfriend?!"

"Yeah…" He looked down giving a soft chuckle.

"Darien, that's the funniest thing I've ever heard." I laughed as I stood up.

I wiped the tears from my eyes as I grabbed the dishes and walked into the kitchen. Darien followed me and stood next to me as I washed the plates off.

"Darien, who was that woman you were with today?" I asked suddenly. I knew I'd let it slip!

"She's a very dear friend. I was helping her pick out an engagement ring."

"Oh. Well, congrats! When is the wedding?" I asked trying to give him the best fake smile I could…and he just laughed.

"Serena, you misunderstood. She's my sister's girlfriend…Raye's girlfriend."

"Mina's a lesbian?!" I squeaked.

"Yeah. How do you know Mina?"

"I work with her. All this time I thought she slept with every guy that worked there, including your dad. And Raye's gay?!"

Wow, I felt dumb! I was jealous over a love circle that wasn't even true!

"You didn't know? Mina was the girl in high school. She and Raye have been together for years. She's proposing to Raye and I had to help her pick out a ring. You were jealous weren't you?" He asked getting a little closer to me.

"What?! Why would I be jealous?"

"Because…you like me."

"Well, of course I like you Darien. If I didn't then I wouldn't be in this mess."

"No…you _like_ me like me."

Before I could say another word he kissed me. It was soft, sweet, sensual. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me a little closer. Slowly he pulled away and smiled.

"You're a good kisser." He said.

"You're not too bad either."

As I turned to walk away, he grabbed my arm. I spun around to face him and pushed me against the wall. His face was only inches away from mine. I felt my heart race and my breathing getting heavier.

"We're going to have sex now, Serena." He stated firmly

"What? It's not time! I'm not ready!" I stammered as he pinned my arms against the wall.

"Yes you are. You're more then ready." He whispered before his lips caught mine and he gave me the hottest, most passionate kiss I've ever had.

I moaned as I felt his hot tongue drag across my bottom lip. He gently nibbled on it gaining full access. He tasted delicious! I closed my eyes and prayed this wasn't a dream; if it was, I didn't want to wake up.

He broke away and grabbed my hand. He walked quickly out of the kitchen, me following behind him. Luna followed too, to see what the commotion was.

"Sorry, kitty. This isn't appropriate for you to see." He said as he closed the bedroom door.

The sun was setting, its rays casting hues from the rainbow into the room. I saw Darien's silhouette as he stepped towards me. He grabbed my waist and pulled me close again. His mouth swept over mine quickly. I closed my eyes again and leaned back against the wall as he nibbled on my ear. His trail of hot kisses descended down my neck and onto my collarbone.

"Arms up." He ordered firmly.

I couldn't even think straight. I lifted my arms over my head and he threw the shirt on the floor. His cool hands made my body react with shivers as he touched my stomach, my back, my breasts.

I felt his hands reach around and unhook my bra. His calloused fingers gently touched the exposed skin, making my nipples very erect.

"Tell me you want me, Serena." He ordered as he put his mouth on my breast, his tongue teasing the already hard nub.

I couldn't even speak. I wasn't even having sex yet and my mind was a blur full of nothing but erotic thoughts.

"I…I want you" I whispered.

He pulled me away from the wall and pushed me on the bed. I landed on my back, now starting to feel a little self conscious of my exposed upper half. His fingers worked quickly trying to unbutton my jeans.

In one swift move, they were off, thrown away with the rest of my clothing. Darien climbed on top of me, his hand gently rubbing me through the fabric of my panties.

"I'm going to make you feel so good. I promise." He whispered in my ear.

I grabbed both sides of his t-shirt and pulled it over his head. Ohh God…his body was so gorgeous. I wanted to do dirty things to every inch of it. I stared in awe.

"Don't be afraid…it's ok. Touch me…" He ordered as he started to rub a little harder.

I arched my back, our skin coming into full contact. It took every ounce of strength I had to try and free him of his pants. I'm not sure how…or even when…but I was now completely naked.

Darien stood off of me and pulled the rest of his clothes off, and there he stood in full nude glory. God, he had a beautiful body; the kind you want to eat ice cream off of.

"I don't think you're ready for me yet." He teased huskily.

He lay next to me, his head resting on his arm as his hand touched me between my thighs. I squirmed and wiggled every which way. Slowly a finger slipped inside me and I just about died right there.

"How does that feel?"

"Oh God, Darien. I want you so bad."

"I know…but not yet."

I felt him slam another finger in me. I cried out in pure ecstasy, the pressure in my abs growing tighter and heavier. Then it all released…I screamed his name as I had my first orgasm. My first orgasm…it was so wonderful, so beautiful! I'm seriously considering buying a few toys!

"Are you ready yet?" He asked as he positioned himself on top of me. His ebony hair fell in his eyes and I reached a shaking hand up and pulled it away. I nodded my head and before I knew it, I felt him pushing his way through me. He fit so tightly, so perfectly. God, sex felt good!

He moved back and forth, slowly at first. I thrust my hips in sync with him. Soon, he was going faster and the only thing I could do was close my eyes, bite my lip and grab his butt. I knew I was going to have an even bigger orgasm then the first one…and buy was I right. My body tensed and wiggled beneath his.

I heard him moan my name a few more times until we both reached that much anticipated climax. His sweaty body collapsed on top of me and we both gasped for air.

"What did you think?" He asked a little exasperated.

"Wow…" I barely choked out.

"Yeah…wow." He repeated.

He pulled the sheets around us and lay next to me. He gently stroked my face and I couldn't help but smile. Somehow, this felt so right…so natural; like he belonged here next to me and this was another night of him and me 'making love'.

"I'm glad you let me be your first." He whispered gently.

"Me too. Who would've thought, after knowing you for a week, we'd have sex."

Darien's smile slowly turned into a slight frown. I knew this couldn't last forever.

"Serena, you know this is part of my job. This is part of your therapy. There are no strings attached. Think of it like a 'friends with benefits' type thing."

"I know Darien but for tonight, please let me live in my little dream where this real and it means something." I pleaded quietly.

"Alright. Can I hold you?" He asked sweetly.

I turned over and let my head rest against his chest, his smooth skin against my cheek. I sighed deeply and closed my eyes, closing out the harsh reality that this was for business only and it wasn't real.

-------

Thanks for all the reviews! More soon! Until then, happy reading!


	7. Chapter 7

"Wake up, sleepy head."

…groan…

"Serena, time to get up."

…groan…

"Serena, get up right now!"

Slowly one eye opened and then the other. I could feel the light burning my retinas. I licked my dry lips and could start to taste something very foul on my tongue. What the hell happened last night?! My mouth tastes like I licked a homeless man's crotch (not that I know from experience what that tastes like!)

"Darien, it's early. Can't we skip the jog today?" I grumbled as I pulled the blanket over my aching head.

"No we can't. How do you plan on changing your life?"

"By lying in bed for the rest of my life. I have such a headache right now. I feel like I'm hung-over." I groaned.

"Well, you probably are." Darien stated matter-of-factly.

"Huh? I didn't drink last night, what are you talking about?"

"Serena, let's go back to yesterday. How much do you remember?" He said as he sat on the bed.

"Umm, I remember you making me wear that horrid dress and we went to lunch and some assholes said some nasty things and the waitress at the restaurant punched the one. She thought you were gay; we went home cause I was pissed at you, I fell asleep, Raye came over and we went to the mall…and I saw you…" My voice started to fade. He _had_ to know what happened last night! Typically you don't forget when you have sex.

"You saw me and got a little pissed…again…and I came here to bring you dinner and found you drunk off your ass. You were telling Luna all the dirty things you'd do to me." He smiled.

I could feel my face burning. I don't think I had ever been so embarrassed! What the hell was I thinking?!?!? Slowly, everything was coming back to me now…

"_Serena? You ok?" He asked as he opened the door quietly._

"_Hey hey, you you, I don't like your girlfriend! No way, no way I think you need a new one" I sang at the top of my lungs, the bottle of liquor my dance partner._

"_Serena, I'm going to turn the stereo off now." He said as he carefully walked towards the CD player. Even with the music off, I still sang loud and off key._

"_Darien let's do it…right now." I flew into his arms. We both fell on the floor with a loud thud, my body landing on top of him._

"_Serena, I don't mean to be rude, but you're crushing me. Please get off." He groaned._

"_Darien, I don't feel so good…"_

"_Oh shit! Aim that way!"_

"_I need to throw up…::hiccup::"_

"_Serena, get up and get into the bathroom! What are you waiting for, an invitation?!"_

"_You're funny and hot and I wanna have sex with you…::giggle::"_

"_Serena, do you need to use the bathroom?"_

"_Maaaaaaaaaybe…" I giggled as I fell onto the couch. "My tummy doesn't feel so good."_

"_Serena, get your ass up now and get to the toilet!"_

_He grabbed my arms and pulled me off the couch. I staggered into the hallway and towards the bathroom. _

"_Get on your knees."_

"Oh, Darien, you dirty boy!" I giggled as I sat beside the toilet.

"_Serena, I wish I had a video camera so you could see yourself tomorrow morning."_

"_Or to video tape us having sex!" _

_And then it came…the lump in the throat and tears in the eyes and then…the blood curdling wail._

"_What's wrong Serena?"_

"_You won't let me eat! I'm fat and ugly and you enjoy watching me starve! I just want to be a hermit in the woods with fifty cats! I don't care if I'm fat! But you do! You're the heifer, Darien, not me! You're just an asshole!"_

_I hunched over into a ball and felt the gurgling of my stomach. The green vomit came up out of my mouth and not into the toilet…but all over Darien's shoes._

"_Oh shit! The toilet's right there!" He shrieked as the goop went all over his toes and under his flip-flops._

"_Sorry, I thought there were two of them in here."_

"I did _what_?" I shrieked as the flashback of me getting sick started to come into full, vivid memory.

"I'm joking about that last part, but you _were _drunk off your ass. You were sort of passed on the couch and moving your way towards the floor. You tried to kiss me a few times though, and let me say, if it wouldn't have been for the strong stench of vomit and rum, it probably would have been hot."

"Did we…you know…" I asked quietly, not daring to look at him. My God what was I _thinking_?! I should know better! I mean the _only_ time alcohol has ever helped me was at Mr. Shield's party! All of the other times I got drunk, I was kicked out of the bars for trying to strip or dance on tables!

"Fuck?" Darien smiled.

"Yeah…"

"No we didn't. Serena, I wouldn't have taken advantage of you like that. Now let's go for a jog. Get up. I'll go get you some juice and an aspirin."

"Darien, can I ask you a strange question and promise you won't get offended?"

"I guess. What is it?"

"Did you tell me Raye and Mina are lesbians last night?"

"Yeah, they are engaged now. You were yelling at me because you saw, and I quote, 'a skinny heifer' with her arms around me and you demanded to know if I was with another woman other then you."

"Oh…sorry. I guess I was just worried about getting an STD or something."

"Yeah right Serena; you want my ass all to yourself. It's ok. But it's my own rule that I only work with one client at a time, so no worries."

"What else did we talk about?" I asked quietly.

"Well, you kept talking about how you weren't ready. I asked what you were talking about and you said ready to have sex. We talked about this while I fed you…and held your hair back while you threw up. So after I cleaned the puke out of your hair and nose, I put you in bed. You pulled me down with you and lay on top of me. I didn't have the heart to leave. You looked so cute with the drool coming out of your mouth. Then you kept moaning and making noises like you were having sex which was really funny, but that's beside the point, and I kept saying "Serena, this isn't real! This is all make believe, wake up" or something like that and then you woke up. "

I put my hands over my face so he couldn't see the different shades of red it was turning. What a morning!

"Don't worry about it Serena. Trust me; I've been with all of my clients at their worst. I once had a lady that was so drunk; she accused her dog of cheating on her! Besides, I think you're the most fun out of all of them. Never a dull moment with you. Now get up, weigh yourself and get ready." He pulled my hands away and gave me his 'sexy smile', the one that make me melt into a pile of warm goo.

As he walked away, I couldn't help but gawk at his _gorgeous _ass in those tight work out pants.

"Stop staring, Serena. It's not polite." He shouted from the hall.

With a loud groan I feel back on the bed and pulled the blankets over my eyes wishing this was a nightmare I'd wake from any moment now.

---------

"Hi Serena! How are you doing?" Mina asked as she sat her skinny little ass on my desk.

Oh, how I hated Mondays…and pretty much any other day I had to be at work.

"Fine I guess. How about you?" I asked without much regard to her.

"Fine! I take it Darien told you my little secret?"

"About you being ga-"

"Shhh! No one knows! Why do you think I flirt with all the guys?! If Darien's dad ever found out, I'd be fired in a second! Please don't tell Serena, I'll do anything." She pleaded with me.

"Mina, why would I tell? It's not my place." I reassured her quietly.

"Then my secret is safe?"

"Absolutely. Are there going to be wedding bells in the near future?"

"Yes! I'm so excited Serena! It was perfect, _she _was perfect."

"I'm so happy for you, Mina. When's the wedding?"

"We're thinking within the next few months. Don't worry, you and Darien are invited." She smiled at me.

"I'm flattered that you'd invite me to the wedding Mina, but you barely know me."

"Oh Serena, Raye and Darien talk about you all the time! I feel like I know you! Besides, we've worked together for about a year now. I like you. You've always been nice to me."

I was just about to play off that sentence when Darien's charming father walked by my desk.

"Morning Serena. Have you been lying off the doughnuts lately? You look a little thinner." He laughed to himself as he walked into the hellhole he called an office.

What I wouldn't give for a shot of something right now. Does it make me a drunk if I want to drink and its only 9:30 in the morning?

"You do look like you've lost weight Serena. How are things going with Darien?" Mina asked quietly.

"Would you like to have lunch today?" I asked bluntly.

"Yeah! That'd be fun! We can have _total_ girl talk. Is 11 ok?"

"Works for me. We can talk about this then." I smiled.

I couldn't help but smile the rest of the day. I've made two friends already, well three if you count Darien. People actually _want_ to hang out with me. Now, if only I could make Darien see me as more then a paycheck and "sympathy lay".

--------

"Hi Lita!" I hugged the little brunette.

"Hey, Serena! How's life?" She asked excitedly.

"It's…life. Just have to take it one day at a time."

"Hi Lita." Mina said as she hugged her.

God, why does everyone involved in this fiasco (sans me) know everyone else that's kind of not involved in this fiasco…if that makes sense!

"Lita is my sister, Serena." Mina clarified.

"Wow, you two look nothing alike." I giggled nervously.

"We get that a lot. I'm the hotter one." Lita smiled.

"You wish! Do you have time to chat with us?" Mina asked.

"Sure, let me get you a table and some drinks first."

I walked behind Mina and Lita towards a little table in the corner, the huge bay window letting the rays of the sun shine in. It made me feel at ease.

"What can I get you to drink?" Lita asked.

"Iced tea with lemon. How about you Serena?"

"The same please."

Lita walked away towards the kitchen leaving me alone with Mina…alone to talk about, you guessed it, Darien.

"So how are things with you and Darien?"

I started playing with the paper wrapper around my napkin and ripped it into little pieces.

"It's ok, Serena. Don't be so nervous." Mina said reassuringly as she placed her hand on top of mine to calm the fidgeting.

"Mina, stop hitting on Serena! I'm telling Raye! What are we talking about?" Lita joked as she set our drinks down.

"We're talking about Serena and Darien, so shut up! Continue Serena." Mina said as she looked at me with her big blue eyes.

I could tell she wanted to know, but why? Was it because she actually cared? Or did she just want all the gossip so she could tell Raye who would tell Darien who would tell me?

"It's going ok I guess. I've lost about six or seven pounds now and it's been a little over a week. My clothes fit better and I feel a little better. Darien's been really nice to work with."

"That's not what I meant. Let me rephrase…have you and Darien…" Mina started to say something I _know _I wasn't going to like when Lita interrupted her and said, "Fucked?"

"Lita! You could have been a little more graceful about asking!" Mina scolded.

"Well it's not like you were gonna ask! Do you even know _how_ to use a penis?" Lita defended herself.

"More then you do! You probably think it's some kid of alien probe!"

Between the two bickering back and forth, I didn't know what to think! I mean yeah, we did 'fuck'…kind of, well in my dreams anyway, but why would they ask me something that personal when they barely know me!

"Lita, could I order lunch now?" I asked abruptly breaking apart the "battle of the bitches".

"Yeah sure, what would you like?" She asked a little confused by the sudden question ad change of subject.

"Just a tuna plate and salad with vinaigrette."

"I'll have a bacon cheeseburger and an order of onion rings." Mina said giving her sweetest smile.

"You're going to die from a heart attack." Lita commented as she walked away.

"So Serena, don't change the subject. Did you guys do _it_?"

"Only in my dreams." I smiled shyly.

"Oh Serena, you like him don't you?"

"I think the only reason I like him is because he's the only male that's ever been nice to me. I mean last night, I talked to him…I think."

"You _think_ you talked to him?" Mina asked with a confused look on her face.

"I don't quite remember, I was drunk. But I think I told him about my past and some other personal things."

"Oh…well, I hope everything works out for you." Mina said, not exactly sure what else to say.

When Lita brought our food out, I remained quiet while the two bickered back and forth on who had the 'sexier significant other'. I guess being a lesbian ran in the family, Lita was gay too. Her and her partner Amy recently had a wedding. Geeze, I was surrounded by lesbians…and not just any lesbians, _angry_ lesbians. You know, the ones you fear more then a marathon of The Simple Life…with Paris and Nicole _not_ boozing! It's so horrific; I don't even want to think about it! It's funny, though I wasn't really paying attention to either one of them, I still retained _more_ then enough information about their personal past times.

-----------

The rest of the day flew by quickly and five came by in no time. On my way home I decided that since I've been doing so well, I should be rewarded. I saw a Burger King coming up and I cut the person off next to me to make my way into the palace of trans fats. I had pulled up behind a car when my cell phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hi Serena, what are you doing?" Darien asked.

"Nothing, just leaving work."

"Oh? You aren't at a certain Burger King?"

"How did you know?!" I shrieked.

"Look to your left…"

I turned my head towards the parking lot and saw Darien leaning against his car. He gave me a little wave and smile.

"Oh shit…" Was all I could say.

"You've been caught Serena. Get out of line…"

I pulled out of line, driving right past him…but not before I gave him the finger.

"That's a good girl. I'll meet you at your place."

That arrogant bastard! I flipped my phone shut and threw it at my purse. The nerve of him watching me! How come _he_ got to have Burger King but I can't?! Probably because he's not overweight, Serena! DUH!

------

"Don't even ask, Darien." I said as I met him at the front door.

"Don't ask what? What you were doing at Burger King?"

"You are such an asshole! I said don't ask! I've been doing very well! I've lost 7 pounds and I don't know why I can't reward myself for it!"

"You lost a little water weight, Serena, you didn't stop world hunger! No, you don't get to reward yourself."

I threw my purse on the couch, Luna ducking just in time.

"Do you mind? I need to change!" I said as Darien followed me into the bedroom.

"We're going out tonight."

"No, I don't want to go out tonight. I want to stay home and maybe watch a chick flick or two!"

"Serena, we're going out with some friends. Now, find a nice cocktail dress and get ready."

"I don't have a _cocktail_ dress Darien! I'm not a Saks Fifth store! I have Lane Bryant in my closet, for peat's sake!"

"Well, I thought you'd say that so here. I bought you one."

He handed me a Lord and Taylor bag. Hesitantly, I took the bag and gave him an evil glare and slammed the door in his face.

"I'll be back in an hour." He yelled through the door.

"Fine!" I yelled back.

I was angry! No, I was pissed! Who did he think he was, walking into _my_ home telling me what _I_ can eat and can't eat and then telling me that I'm going out with him?! No one tells me what to do! If I want to stay home, who is he to tell me otherwise?! Alright Serena, give Darien a run for his money. Look drop dead gorgeous tonight, look sexy and confident; make his head do a double take. Be…the client from Hell tonight…

-------

Ok, so before you hate me for making Ch. 6 a dream, let me explain; I was originally going to make it real and have it be "the day after", but then I got an even better idea on where to take this. Trust me it's worth the wait (I think anyway!). So don't hate me yet, you can hate me later if you don't like the story when it's done. Sorry for the little delay for the chapter- I had a little thing of writer's block and then…at 2 am this morning…it came to me! Until the next update, happy reading! OH! Don't forget, if you leave me a review it has to be before 2 am or after 3 am because of maintenance on the FF site. Much love!


	8. Chapter 8

"Serena, are you ready yet? We're going to be late!"

"Would you shut up?! I said I'll be out in a few minutes!"

"You said that twenty minutes ago! I'm coming in!"

I quickly ran to the door and locked it. I was not ready! I was going to look gorgeous tonight and damn it, he was not going to stop me because we would be late to go get drunk with _his_ friends!

"Serena, let me in! What are you doing in there?!"

"Nothing! Go sit down or watch TV."

I went to the bathroom and took the curlers out of my hair. I combed the curls out with my fingers and quickly sprayed it. I pulled my bangs down and pinned them to the side with a little rhinestone butterfly clip. Practically pulling the drawer off the hinges, I grabbed the fire engine red lipstick and quickly applied it. I looked _hot!_

Darien got me this gorgeous cocktail dress (whatever that was!). It was black with red pinstripes and a nice little halter neck. My calves looked awesome! I was so impressed with what a week's worth of jogging could do! The dress showed them off quite nicely, if I do say so myself. I grabbed the little black sequined cardigan out of my closet and put it on…I don't care how hot I looked, I'm not showing my arms; they jiggle like a bowl of Jell-O.

"Serena, if you don't open the door right now, I'm busting it down!"

"I'm getting my shoes on you impatient ass!"

I quickly grabbed a pair of black high heeled sandals. I could barley walk in them sober, God help me if Darien has to help me home drunk!

"I'm coming out…" I warned. Oh yeah, he was going to be in shock…

"Wow, you clean up nice. Let's go." He said as he grabbed my arm and pulled me out into the hallway.

"That's it?" I asked hurt.

"Is what it?"

"I clean up nice? What the hell, Darien?! You don't tell a girl she cleans up nice! That's something you tell a male friend of yours! Wanna scratch my ass and drink beers and talk about large breasts?! Is that what you look at me as, 'a buddy'?!"

"Oh Serena…if you wouldn't have taken so long to get ready…" He said huskily as he gently pushed me against the wall, his arms pinning me against him. He leaned his head closer to my ear, his breath tickling it. "I might have told you how beautiful…hot…sexy you are. If we didn't have a prior engagement, I'd probably take you right here on the wall. You know how beautiful you look and you know what you're doing to me. Unfortunately, I can't play your game right now. We have to go…"

Slowly, he pulled his head up, his gaze meeting mine. I could feel my heart racing in my chest and the butterflies in my stomach threatening to break free. I closed my mouth, which was now dry from being agape during his whole "I'm-so-sexy-and-I'm-going-to-have-sex-with-you-because-you're-sexy" speech.

"Ready?" He smiled as he held out his hand.

I couldn't even speak. I swallowed hard and held out my sweaty (oh God, he made me sweaty! I hope I don't stink! Good thing I put on extra deodorant!) hand and placed it in his.

---------

"Hi Darien, darling. It's been a long time hasn't it?" A gorgeous red headed woman threw here arms around his neck. I swear her boobs were going to pop out of her purple dress. I was surprised no ass cheeks came out to say hi. Seriously, was she going for the hooker look?

I really hate it when women who have awesome bodies, and _know_ they have awesome bodies, wear clothes that cover them like a layer of latex…she was one of _those_. I could feel her emerald eyes throwing daggers at me…or maybe she had fifty face lifts; there really wasn't any definite emotion showing through her face. Her stupid, ugly face that was porcelain white and had no flaws…God, I hated this bitch!

"It's nice to see you too, Beryl. This is a very good friend of mine, Serena." Darien introduced after he practically pried her little toothpick arms off him.

"Hmm, Serena. So nice to meet you." She gritted.

"Oh the pleasure is all mine." I answered sweetly.

This bitch was going to meet her match. Last week, there was nothing between my legs except for a vagina. This morning when I woke up, I grew a set of brass balls.

-----

"Hi guys!" Mina and Raye bounced over to us. They flew down the stairs leading to the upstairs of the club. It was a nice club, all dark and with cool lights ( I swear I was like a kid with A.D.D until Darien drew me away from the disco ball).

"We have a private room upstairs. Come on!" Mina shouted half way down the steps.

Darien grabbed my hand and pulled me through the crowd of people to the winding staircase.

"Wow, we didn't think you were coming. You're late!" Raye said…well…slurred…as she hugged Darien.

"Thank Serena for that." Darien replied.

"I'm sorry, if you only gave me one hour to look my best!"

"Serena, you look hot! If Mina hadn't already popped the question, I'd be all over you like a STD on a porn star!" Raye giggled as she hugged me.

"Ok, Raye, sweetie. Come sit down." Mina said as she grabbed Raye off of me. She helped Raye over to the couch in the corner of the dark room where they both sat, well more like fell gracefully onto the cushions.

I giggled as I walked over to the balcony and looked down at all the people dancing. They had karaoke going tonight…God help me if I got drunk!

"Want a drink?" Darien said as he stood next to me, his arms leaning against the balcony.

Hot damn, did I wanna take him right now! His black pants and black shirt and black sport coat and black hair…God, did this man look good in black! I bet even his underwear was black! Oh, what I wouldn't give for a little peak! I had to keep telling myself he had on whitie tighties…the kind my grandpa wore.

"Margarita would be nice." I smiled.

"Coming right up." His fingers came up and a stray curl behind me ear as he left for the bar.

"So, Serena was it?" That evil little woman came up next to me.

"Yes. Is it Beryl?"

"Yes. So, Serena…how did you meet Darien?"

Oh shit! What do I say, "He's my man whore and I'm his sex slave?!"

"Well, actually I met him through Mina and his dad. I work with her and his dad is my boss."

"Oh, so you work at the law firm? How interesting."

"What do you do for a living?" I asked trying to make pleasant conversation.

"I'm a millionaire. I don't do anything except shop and vacation."

"Oh, that must be nice. No responsibilities."

"Oh darling, it's more responsibility then you think."

"Are you married?" I asked trying to change the subject. It must be _so _boring going to Tahiti or the Bahamas!

"Yes I am. My husband brings home the money and I spend it. I don't love my husband. To him, I'm a trophy wife. I'm actually in love with someone who doesn't want me in return…my step-son."

"Well, that's the story of my life…well, the part about loving someone who doesn't want me in return, not about the step-son part." I replied awkwardly.

"Oh darling, you couldn't possibly think we have something in common. I mean, look at me and then look at you."

I was about to bitch slap this woman until Darien came behind me with my drink.

"Thank you." I said as I took a sip…well more like a gulp. I practically drank the whole thing in three breaths.

"Are you ok, Serena?" Darien asked a little concerned.

"Peachy."

"Wanna dance?"

"Thought you'd never ask!"

I grabbed Darien's hand and pulled him behind me as we made it to the dance floor where some skinny heifer in a mini skirt and belly shirt (which turned out to be Lita, whoops!) was singing 'Buttons'. Don't get me wrong, I like the Pussy Cat Dolls, I just hated their skinny little bodies.

"So what did you think of Beryl?" Darien asked as he put his arms around my waist and pulled me close to him.

"What a bitch! Who goes around telling people "I'm a stupid bitch, I have lots of money so I can get my skinny ass skinny and I go on vacations and probably cheat on my husband with his spoiled, rich, most likely _gay_ son because I'm a stupid, skinny bitch!" Seriously, I can't stand her!"

"Me either." He laughed.

"Then why do you put up with her?!"

"I have to; she's my step-mom."

"What?! Ewww! Darien she told me how she wanted to practically jump your ass!"

"Is that verbatim?" He giggled.

"Well, it's the general idea. That's my boss's wife?!"

"Yeah, and I'm your boss's son. What's your point?"

"This is like my worst nightmare come true!"

"Why? Because you're going to be banging your boss's son whose wife wants to bang him and not her husband?"

"In so many words…yes."

"Oh Serena, you're too cute."

Darien leaned down and gave me a little peck on my head. Slowly his lips brushed against my cheeks and down to my lips. Oh geeze that dream from the other night was _nothing_ compared to this! Probably because this was the real thing, but still, oh my God!

Slowly he pulled away leaving me breathless.

"Wow…" He sighed.

"Yeah…wow…" I whispered trying to gain my breath.

"You're probably the best kiss I've ever had, Serena."

"Yeah right!"

"I'm being serious."

"I don't believe that, Darien." I sighed softly.

"Want me to prove it?"

Before I could say another word, his lips were on mine again. He pulled me closer to him, his fingers drawing patterns on my back. I wrapped my arms around his neck and arched my neck into his shoulder as I let his lips ravage mine.

"Hey you two get a room!" I heard a soft voice giggle from off to the side.

Reluctantly I pulled away. I was going to kill whoever broke my little make-out session!

"Oh my God, Amy! It's been forever!" Darien shrieked as he threw his arms around a short, petite little woman. Her hair almost looked blue under the strobe lights.

"Hi Darien! It looks like we're going to be family soon!"

"Who would've thought my sister and your…partner/wife's sister would get married?!"

"Who is this lovely lady?" She smiled sweetly.

"Amy, this is Serena. Serena, this is Dr. Amy Mizano."

"Oh please Darien. No formalities. Amy will do just fine; it's a pleasure to meet you Serena."

"The same. Lita has told me so much about you."

"All good things, I hope! Well, I'm going to go pull Lita off the stage now, we'll catch up later. Darien, it was so nice seeing you again and Serena, it was a pleasure meting you."

She walked away towards the stage where Lita was singing her heart out. Darien looked at me with a smile and I couldn't help but blush and look away. I heard him start to say something when that cackly voice came.

"Oh Darien, I've been looking everywhere for you! Could you help me outside? I'm not feeling so well." Beryl said as she put a hand on her head.

"Serena I'll be right back. Why don't you go upstairs and hang out with the girls until I come back?" He gave me a quick peck on the cheek and walked away, Beryl with her hands all over him.

-----

"Don't let it get you down, Serena." Lita said.

"What?" I asked snapped out of my thoughts.

I had gone back upstairs and sat on the couch in between Mina and Lita.

"Beryl is an old ho. Seriously, you have nothing to worry about. Darien has been keeping her at bay for years."

"I'm not worried about that. He's been gone for a little while now; I'm just a little worried. I think I'm going to find him."

I got up off the couch and made my way down the stairs towards the front door. I pushed past some young kids arguing with the bouncer about their ID's and into the warm summer nighttime air. I started to walk a little bit down the sidewalk. That's when I saw it…my heart felt like it was being ripped into a million pieces. Beryl had her arms around Darien and Darien's lips were locked with hers, his hand up her dress. Without saying a word, I turned around and quickly walked back inside.

-----

"Is he ok?" Amy asked as she handed me a drink.

"He's fine." I replied flatly as I took the drink from her hands and gulped it down.

"It's about time you returned! We all thought she had tied you up and raped you or something." Raye giggled. "Beryl, I thought you weren't feeling well."

"I feel much better now, thank you." She smiled as she touched his back

"Yeah…" Was all Darien said. He shifted uncomfortably under her touch.

"Darien, let's go back downstairs. I have a little surprise for you."

Darien gave me a strange look and shrugged it off as he followed behind me.

"Oh I have to see this! Come on!" Raye said as she pulled Mina to her feet.

Soon Lita and Amy followed Darien and I onto the dance floor.

"Wait here." I giggled as I gave him a kiss. I could feel Beryl's glare burning through me as I gave his ass a little squeeze and walked towards the DJ.

"Ladies and gentleman, Miss Serena would like to sing a song." The DJ announced.

I grabbed the microphone and walked to the front of the stage and said, "This song is dedicated to you Darien. Hit it!"

Soon the music started and I opened my mouth and belted out the words:

_Check it out  
Going out  
On the late night  
Looking tight  
Feeling nice  
It's a cock fight  
I can tell I just know  
That it's going down   
Tonight  
At the door we don't wait cause we know them  
At the bar six shots just beginning  
That's when dick head put his hands on me  
But you see  
I'm not here for your entertainment   
You don't really want to mess with me tonight  
Just stop and take a second  
I was fine before you walked into my life  
Cause you know it's over  
Before it began  
Keep your drink just give me the money  
It's just you and your hand tonight_

I didn't even wait for the song to end. I threw the microphone at the DJ and stomped off the stage towards Darien.

"I saw you and her Darien. You actually made me believe that someone like you could be interested in someone like me."

"Oh darling I already told you, people like _you_ and people like Darien and I couldn't possibly have anything in common." Beryl chimed in.

"You're right Beryl." I said as I hung my head. I did the only thing a girl in my situation could do…punch this bitch's lights out! I threw my fist right into her porcelain jaw where she fell onto the ground. "You and Darien are both scum and I'm not." I walked over her skinny little body and towards the front door.

I heard Raye, Mina and Lita laugh their asses off as Amy kneeled down to make sure I didn't do any permanent damage to the 'she-devil'.

"Serena, wait!"

"Go to Hell, Darien!" I yelled as I quickened my pace down the sidewalk.

"Serena, get back here!"

"No!"

I felt his hand grab my arm and turn me around, his hands pinning me against the bricks of a building.

"Let me go."

"No."

"Darien, I'm warning you…"

"What are you going to do, punch me?"

"No, I have something better in mind." I brought my knee up and hit him right where it hurt…you guessed it, the testicles.

He fell on his knees, his hands gripping the area between his legs.

"You're lucky I let you keep them." I scoffed.

If anything, out of spending a little less then a month with Darien, he taught me how to defend myself. He taught me to kick ass and take names and for that I was thankful, but what he did was just…I don't know…I mean it's not like we're together but, he kissed me! How could he kiss me and make me feel so special and then make out with that walking mattress (I mean, everyone's slept on her!).

"Serena…would you wait one minute, please?" He groaned as he stumbled behind me.

"What Darien? What more could you possibly do or say to me tonight? I already feel terrible!"

"I think I'm falling for you…"

I turned around to look into his eyes and I could tell he wasn't lying. I could see the spark that he felt for me glimmering in those breathtakingly beautiful blue eyes.

"I've already fallen for you Darien. That's why this hurts so much." I started to cry.

"Don't cry Serena. It kills me to know I made those tears." He whimpered as he released one hand from his crotch and touched my hand.

"Let's go home, ok?" I choked as I wiped a tear away.

"Just one thing before we leave." He said as we walked towards the car.

Before I could say another word he grabbed me and crashed his lips down upon mine. His hands wrapped themselves possessively around my waist as he pushed me against another wall. I wrapped my arms around his neck and moaned slightly as he deepened the kiss. God, mad, passionate make-out sessions were _hot_!

"We need to get back home, Serena…now." He growled in my ear.

"What?" I whispered hazily. I was still in a daze from the power of his lips.

"Serena, we're going to have sex…whether it be here on this building or in your bed, we're going to do it. Do you understand?"

He pushed his leg between mine and captured my lips again with his. If he kept this up, my 'first time' (sorta) would be on the wall of a bank. How romantic!

"Let's go." I whispered as I broke away.

-------

Song: U + UR Hand

Artist: P!NK

Obviously I don't own anything except the idea (although I do wish I was bad ass like Pink! Thanks for all the reviews! I wuv you all soooo much! Until next chapter, happy reading!


	9. Chapter 9

The ride home was pretty silent. Awkwardly silent actually. I mean, it wasn't but ten minutes ago he was all over me and now…he was treating me like I was his mother (oh God I _had_ to go there!) I don't know what came over me but I thought it'd be a good idea to throw my shoe at him…while he was driving. Probably not the _best_ idea I ever had.

"Serena, are you trying to get us killed?!" He yelled as he swerved to avoid hitting another car.

"You're an asshole, Darien!" I screamed.

"What? Where did this come from?"

"I saw you with you're her! I saw you with her hand up her skirt and making out with her and yet you come crawling back to me! I can't believe I wanted to have sex with you!"

"Serena, would you calm down for a minute?"

"No! Why should I? Why do I always have to calm down?! I'm calm enough, Darien!"

"Serena! Shut up!"

Wow, he had never talked to me like that before. I felt the lump in my throat build up as I turned my face away from him and looked out the window. This man has caused me too many tears.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap, but would you just listen to me for a second, please?" He said gently.

I didn't bother to respond. I think he got the general idea I would be quit now when I pursed my lips so tight, I thought I'd swallow my head.

"Yes, you did see me with her. I'm not going to lie. I helped her outside to her car. When the valet pulled it around, I opened the door for her to get in and she threw herself on me and forced my hand up her skirt. I swear Serena, I didn't want to. You must've walked away before you saw me throw her off me and tell her if she _ever _did that again I would tell my dad and she wouldn't get a penny."

"Darien, why didn't you do what I did?"

"What, bitch slap her? I can't hit a woman, Serena. That's domestic violence."

"There's nothing domestic about that cu-"

"Serena! Language! Where did this come from?!"

"I don't know. I mean, I woke up this morning and felt like my usual self but this evening, it was like someone finally woke me up. I didn't want to take crap from people anymore, I didn't want to be the butt of their joke. It feels good to stand up for myself and let people know "Hey, I'm Serena, don't piss me off". I feel…good. For the first time in a long time I feel…not so good…" I grabbed my stomach.

"Serena, you just said you felt good about yourself, how could you change your mind that quickly? You've made a major breakthrough!"

"No you idiot, I'm going to be sick!"

"Not in my car! Hold on!" 

"Darien, pull over!"

He sped up and cut off some people on the expressway pulling off to the shoulder of the highway. Immediately, I grabbed the handle and pulled desperately trying to open it.

"Darien!"

"Oh shit, it's locked!"

As Darien fidgeted with the switches looking for the lock I did the only thing I could do at that moment…vomit all over the door, the window, the dashboard and Darien.

"Oh God, I'm so sorry." I whimpered between heaves, but it wouldn't stop. Soon it became projectile. He ducked just in time as I hit his window.

"Well, I guess we should find a car wash that's open at midnight." He said unamused.

"I'm so sorry, Darien. I had those drinks on a semi-empty stomach. I don't hold alcohol very well."

"No kidding." He replied flatly.

God, he made me feel terrible! I mean, it was only a little puke and this was a car! I mean, cars _can_ be cleaned!

"Oh, don't cry Serena. It's ok. It can be cleaned."

"I know but-but…WAHH!!!"

I couldn't help it! I was super emotional! It _had_ to be getting close to that time of month. Time to stock up on Hershey bars and Ben & Jerry's. I think my Kleenex supply was still sufficient.

"Let's just go home, ok? You want me to stop and get some crackers and Coke?"

"No, I just wanna go home." I squeaked as snot ran down my nose.

-----

"Serena, you're gonna have to help me out here. I need you to wake up a little and open the door." Darien grunted.

I had fallen asleep in the car and even when woken up to Darien smacking me, I was still too incoherent to make it upstairs to my apartment. So, what does Daren do? He decided it'd be a good idea to carry me up on his back. What a silly man!

"You can set me down now, Darien." I grumbled half asleep.

"Are you gonna fall over?"

"No, I'll be fine. I think…"

Darien carefully set me down. I lost my footing seeing as I had one high heel on and bare foot on the other.

"Are you sure you weren't sniffing something while you were there?"

"Darien, I'm not in the mood. Shut up."

Slowly I opened the door and made my way into the dark apartment. I threw off my other shoe without even looking and kind of shuffled my way into the bedroom. I flipped on the switch and grabbed my pink bunny pj's and made my way into the bathroom. Whoa, what the hell happened to me?! Boy was I sight for sore eyes. My hair was now one big frizz ball; my mascara was running down cheeks, my lipstick left a red stain around my lips. I looked a 60 year old prostitute!

"You ok?" I heard Darien ask through the door.

"Peachy." I replied flatly as I opened the door and collapsed on the bed.

"Serena, you don't look so good. You have a fever. I think this was more then a little too much to drink."

"I feel like a big, hot, steaming pile of cow dung."

"You look gorgeous." He said as he stroked the hair away from my face.

"I think _you_ had too much to drink."

"Serena, you could be wearing a mumu, have purple hair with orange polka-dots and twelve fingers and toes with a club foot and I'd still think you were beautiful." He whispered into my ear as I turned to face him.

"Darien, will you stay with me tonight?"

"Yeah. I'll call my dad in the morning and tell him you're not coming in."

He gave me a little peck on my cheek and started to walk towards the door when I sat up and said, "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to get the pillow and blanket out of the closet and steal Luna's couch. You do want me to stay, right?"

"I meant here…with me." I said shyly as I looked away.

Darien turned off the light and closed the door. The shadows the moon had cast danced across his face. He unbuttoned his shirt making my heart skip beats as I saw for the first time just _how_ beautiful this man really was. He smiled at my reaction as he unbuttoned his pants.

"Are you ok?" He asked in a low growl.

"Yeah…" I managed to gulp.

Soon he was standing there before me in baring nothing but…Spongebob boxers? What?! You have got to be kidding me! I mean, I practically have a freakin' God standing in front of me in my bedroom 99 naked and he's wearing _Spongebob_?!

"What's wrong?" He asked concerned.

"Nothing." I tried to stifle my giggle.

"It's the underwear, isn't it?"

I couldn't help it. I burst out in a full fit of laughter until my stomach hurt and I had tears in my eyes. And then it came; the one little flaw about me that I wished Darien would _never_ hear…the snort. Yes, I snorted. Wow, as if Mr. Squarepants didn't already kill the mood, my alter ego as Miss Piggy definitely did.

"What the hell was that?" Darien asked between laughs.

"It's not funny!' I retorted.

"Oh, and my undies are?!"

"Well, come on Darien, you're a grown man, let me rephrase, a _hot_ grown man wearing a cartoon on his ass! What a fuckin' dork!"

"Oh, and you're a grown woman, let me rephrase, a newfound badass grown woman who snorts! Do a little too much coke back in the day there, Tanelian?"

"OH! Darien, you stupid man! It's your fault! You're wearing those stupid things!"

"Fine! Does this fix things?!" He yelled back as he pulled his boxers down showing me everything his mama gave him.

"Ummm, wow…" I managed to spit out.

Umm wow didn't do what was before me justice. Holy crap, was his dad a horse?! I put my hands on my face and felt my face grow hotter and hotter, just like the pit of my stomach. Without saying a word Darien walked closer to the bed until he was on all fours pinning me down, his lips on mine. His hands were roaming up and down my body; my arms, my hips, my face. He trailed his moist lips down my throat to my collarbone.

"Do you want me, Serena?" He asked as he nibbled gently at the sensitive skin.

"I…I…oh God…" Was pretty much all I could say at the moment considering the man was practically intoxicating my senses.

His hand went under my shirt and gently massaged at the soft flesh of breast. I arched my back at how sensitive I was feeling under his touch.

"You're not ready for me to ravish you yet. But that doesn't mean I can't take advantage of you in other ways." He whispered.

Without another word, his hand in my pants gently massaging me through my underwear. I couldn't help but let a moan escape from my lips. Soon his fingers found a new home under the fabric and deep inside me.

"Oh God!" I yelled as I gripped the sheets.

"Is this what you want? Do you want to feel good?"

I couldn't answer him. My mind was in shambles right now as the glorious sensations he was causing me was getting more intense.

"Answer me, Serena. You don't want me to stop."

"I want to feel good, oh God Darien, harder!"

Soon he was rubbing me and I could feel the ball of tension in the pit of my stomach start to grow larger and larger. I arched my back and moaned and screamed as I finally let myself go. I quivered under his touch as he continued to stroke a little softer.

"Ok, Darien." I managed to whisper between pants.

"Uh uh. I'm not done with you yet."

He pulled his hand from my pajama bottoms and kneeled by my feet. Before I could even ask what he was doing, he grabbed both sides of pants and pulled them right off. Instinctivley I wrapped my arms around my stomach.

"Don't be self-conscious, Serena. I want to see that sexy, confidant Serena from earlier."

Hesitantly I lowered my arms to my sides. He kissed my stomach, my thighs, and every inch of me from the waist down. Gently he looped his fingers through the fabric of my underwear and pulled them down my legs. I tried to sit up and look to see what he was doing but I thrown back down when I felt his tongue barely touching the outer layer of my most intimate spot.

I was moaning loud when he slipped his fingers in me and stimulated my clitoris simultaneously. I brought both of my hands into his hair and gripped. I wiggled and squirmed beneath his firm grip on my hips.

"You want to come, don't you?" He whispered playfully.

"Uh huh…" I whispered.

"You are _so_ wet, Serena. You taste delicious." He said as he plowed his face back to where I wanted it.

My throat was dry, my hands shaking, my body trembling until I finally reached my climax and screamed in pure ecstasy. What I had not more then two minutes ago was _nothing_ compared to what Darien gave me just now. I arched my back as the last tremor left my body and I fell back on the bed completely exhausted.

Darien pulled my garments back on me seeing as I had no energy whatsoever. As soon as the fabric touched my hot skin I jerked a little. Amazing how the sensitivity lingers even minutes after an orgasm…or two.

"How do you feel?" He asked sweetly as he pulled a strand of hair away from my face.

"……." I couldn't even spit out a syllable.

"That good, huh?"

"……"

"Are you ready for bed?"

I managed to give a little nod of my head. Oh what a chore it was to move!

"Darien?" I finally found my voice.

"Yeah, love?"

"Did you really mean what you said? About you falling for me?"

"Yeah. I mean, I haven't known you for very long, but I know I love to be with you and around you. You make me laugh, Serena. You are so loving and to be honest, I don't think I've ever met someone as quirky as you. I've never met anyone like you. What about you? Did you mean what you said?"

"I fell for you the moment I was in that creepy building and you had on your bondage. I like you…a lot."

"I like you alot too and I'd like to get to know you more."

"I'd like that too." I yawned.

Darien grabbed me and brought me closer to him. I rested his head against his chest and started to drift off to sleep.

-------

"Serena?"

I shifted over to my side, still half asleep.

"Serena!"

I jumped up as I heard Darien's voice.

"What? Oh my God?! What happened?!"

I wrapped the blankets around Darien and I as I looked at the five officers standing in my bedroom.

"Everything alright here, folks?" The one officer asked, his hand placed carefully on his gun.

"Everything's fine! What are you doing in my apartment?" I asked frantically.

"We got a call about a half hour about screams coming from this apartment. We knocked on the door but no one answered."

"Probably because it's 3 in the morning and we were _sleeping_!" I shrieked.

"Do you know anything about the screams, sir?" The cop asked Darien.

"Well, officer, it did come from here but it's not what you think." Darien laughed nervously.

The older man gave Darien a strange look while he looked around the room. His face turned bright red when he noticed Darien's discarded clothes and…Spongebob boxers laying on the floor.

"I see. Well, sorry for the intrusion. You folks have a good night."

The cop pushed his way through the others standing behind him and walked out of my bedroom.

"Ha! She must be screamer!" I heard one guy laugh as they made their way towards my front door.

I was so embarrassed! Now if I ever did have an emergency, I couldn't call the NYPD! They'd remember me as 'the screamer'!

"Are you alright?" Darien asked.

"No! I mean, I just had five cops in my room knowing my business!"

"Serena, relax. They must get this a lot. I mean, this is New York. You know how many hookers there are."

"Darien shut up!"

I heard my stomach gurgling and I ran for the bathroom as fast as I could. I threw my head in the toilet and dry heaved letting a little bit of whatever I didn't throw up from earlier now escape my stomach.

"You ok Serena?"

"Peachy…" I groaned.

I reached over to the sink and turned the handle for the cold water. I rinsed out my mouth and splashed waster on my face. Slowly I stood to my feet and stumbled to my bed.

"Want me to get you something?"

"No, I just need sleep."

I lay my head down on my soft pillow and closed my eyes. Darien curled up behind me, wrapping his arm tenderly around me.

"Good night, Serena. Pleasant dreams." He whispered as he gave me a little peck on the head.

"Ditto…" was all I said until I drifted off into a world where I thin and beautiful and Darien was my true love and we lived happily ever after.

-------

You guys are so sweet, seriously! I love your reviews, every single one of them. They are the highlight of my day. It'll probably be a few days before I update again seeing as I have about 6 billion ways I want this stupid story to go and I have to decide on 1! Until then, happy reading!


	10. Chapter 10

Ok, so it's been about a few weeks since the club incident; well, if you wanna call it that. I mean, I did get to have an orgasm or two. More like fifty since then but moving on…Darien and I are doing fabulous. I mean, it's hard getting used to the idea of having a boyfriend. Well, technically he never asked and I never said yes. I just assume we are. We would have to be, right? I mean, he did very _very_ dirty things that I will not mention…now. Wow, I'll have to ask him about that later.

Anyway, I've lost a total now 16 pounds, woohoo! I'm down in the 190's. Do you know how long it's been since I've been in the 100's? I think freshman year of high school. I'm totally digging this weight loss thing. I feel good, I look good; better then I did which is a major improvement. I've gone down one whole dress size! I only have another four to go.

----------

"Please Serena? I want you to be there! It'd mean the world to both of us." Raye pleaded with me.

"Are you sure you want me to go help you pick out your wedding gowns?" I asked.

"We wouldn't ask if we didn't mean it. Please?" Mina chimed in.

Both of the girls asked me if I'd like to have lunch with them since it is a Saturday afternoon and I didn't have anything better to do then sit on my decreasing fat ass. So here we sat, at some Italian place I've never heard of deliberating over whether or not I'd help them pick out dresses.

"Well, if you two really want me to go, I'd be honored."

"Great! I have to call Lita and tell her to meet us the bridal store!" Mina squeaked as she pulled her cell phone out of her purse.

"Serena, Mina and I would like you to be in the wedding." Raye said as she sipped on her Italian soda.

"Are you serious?"

"Of course! I mean, you're practically like a sister to us now. Darien really likes you and he needs someone to stand up with him. Lita and Ami are standing up together so that leaves Darien solo."

"Raye, I'm flattered you would want me to be a part of your big day."

"Alright, Lita's leaving right now. She has to pick up Ami from the hospital but she's meeting us there in 20. Let's go." Mina said as she closed her phone.

--------------

"I don't like that one." Lita said as Raye spun around in the fluffy white gown.

"Why not? I think it's adorable!"

"You look an 80's prom date gone bad. Next!"

"Isn't it bad luck for the bride to see the...other bride…in her wedding dress?" I asked.

"That's why we have them coming out one at a time. While Raye is changing Mina should be coming out now." Ami whispered back.

"I like it, but no. Next!" Mina said as she looked at Mina's dress.

"I'll be right back." I whispered to Lita and Ami.

I happened to see the sales lady put a dress on a rack that was gorgeous. I raced over to it and grabbed before the brunette in the corner who was eyeing could get it.

"Excuse me?"

I turned around to see the brunette tapping me lightly on my shoulder.

"Can I help you?" I asked surprised.

"Yeah, I was looking at the dress, the one in your hands. Do you mind if I try it on?"

"Well, I was about to take it to the fitting room. If it doesn't work, then absolutely I'll give it to you."

"Honey we both know that ain't gonna fit you. So let's just save you the embarrassment and me the time. Hand it over!"

Who did this bitch think she was?! I mean, no a size 4 wouldn't fit even one butt cheek but seriously! It wasn't even for me!

"Listen Bridzilla, this isn't for me. It's for one of my friends. If it doesn't work for either one of them, then I'll let you have it, until then, hands off Barbie!"

I threw the dress over my shoulder and stormed off towards the fitting rooms.

"Oh that's gorgeous! I could see Mina in it!" Lita gushed.

I knocked gently on the fitting room door and tossed it over to Mina.

"It's gorgeous!" I heard her squeak.

"I'm going to go look for another dress for Raye." I said as I walked out of the fitting area.

"Can I help you?" A short, stout sales woman asked.

"No, just looking. Thank you."

"What size are you looking for, a 16 maybe?"

"No, a size 4."

I rolled my eyes as I saw that "You've gotta be shittin' me look" escape her face.

"It's for my friends, not me." I explained quickly.

"Oh, this way. These are some of our designer gowns here and over there are a few more one of a kind dresses. Let me know if I can help you."

I walked up and down the endless aisles of white lace and pearls and sighed wistfully at the thought of me possibly dying an old maid. I mean, yes Darien and I _like_ each other but it'll only be a matter time until he finds someone prettier, thinner, richer, more established and basically all around _better_ then me. Who am I kidding? I should end it now before I really get my heart broken but a part of me wants things to stay where they are; with Darien _liking_ me and me liking him and we live, well, I live in this fairytale that he'll one day love me and we live happily ever after.

Yes, we've only known each other for about a month and a half but I really like him. He makes me feel pretty and sexy and smart. His dad will hopefully give me a raise and promotion once I graduate and then I can be that confidant, sexy, successful lawyer I so desperately want to be. I want to turn people's heads with my witty remarks and sexy body. But most importantly, I want to turn Darien's head. Maybe coming to this stupid bridal shop was a bad idea. It has me thinking…

I grabbed a dress off the rack and walked towards the fitting rooms again when another gown caught my eye. I walked over and gently touched the silky fabric and smiled like an idiot as I thought of myself wearing it.

"Want to try it on?" The sales lady asked.

"Oh no, thank you. I don't even have a boyfriend let alone fiancé. It'd just be a tease."

"Oh come on honey, I haven't seen anyone try this one and it's one of my favorite gowns. Let me see you model it, please?"

How could I say no? I mean, she was so cute and fluffy; I wanted to give her a hug…and a cookie. I smiled and took the dress in my arms as I walked towards the fitting rooms with her.

"Here's a dress for Raye." I said as I handed the bundle of lace to Lita.

"Oh, and who's that for?" She giggled.

"The lady wants me to try it on. I'll be back in a second." I groaned.

I walked into a little room and closed the door. I stared in awe at the dress as I hung it up on the door. I could feel myself want to cry a little as I thought about my wedding. What would it be like? I don't have a father to walk me down the isle, or mother to argue with over my honeymoon or church.

Breath Serena, it's not like you're getting married. You're just acting as a model. Just, breathe.

I inhaled deeply as I started to undress.

After gaining some confidence I walked out of the room and out onto the little platform where the girls "oooed and ahhhed".

"Serena, you look beautiful!" Mina sighed.

"That dress was made for you." Ami said quietly.

I smiled and could feel myself blushing. I turned around and looked at myself in the mirrors. I did look beautiful. In fact, I looked down right gorgeous.

"Now, you just need a groom, sweetie." The sales lady giggled as she straightened out the train.

"Don't I have potential?"

I turned around to see Darien smiling at me, his tall built body leaning against the door frame.

"No comment." I smiled.

"You do look beautiful, Serena. Stunning in fact." He smiled.

Oh my God, I think I'm going to orgasm if he keeps looking at me like that. Slowly he walked towards me. He hopped up on the small podium and stood beside me turning me around so I could see the reflection of him and I.

"Alright you two, Darien keep in your pants and Serena put your tongue back in your mouth. We've found our dresses, let's go." Lita broke the awkward, yet exciting tension between us.

"I'm going to go change. I'll be right back." I said quietly.

"Let's go pay for the dresses. We'll meet you outside Serena." Raye shouted as she walked away.

I opened the fitting room door and closed it quickly. Then it dawned on me; how am I going to get out of it?

"Darien?"

"Yeah, Serena?"

"Could you help me?"

Slowly the handle turned and his head popped into the little cube.

"I need you to unzip me."

I turned my back to him and lifted my hair out of his way. His warm hands felt incredible on my cool back. His fingertips lightly touched the sensitive skin leaving goosebumps along their descent. I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes at how wonderful it felt.

"Let me help you get out of this." He whispered in my ear.

His hands gently touched the straps and pulled them off my shoulders, the gown falling in a pool of silk and tulle around my feet. I gasped slightly as one hand gently massaged my exposed breast.

"Hey you two! Stop fucking in there!" I heard Lita's voice snap me back to reality.

My face turned fifty shades of red and I could feel the heat growing. I quickly grabbed my sundress off the floor and threw it on, then reached down and grabbed my flip flops.

"I needed help getting out of the dress. We weren't doing anything, I swear." I stammered as I opened the door.

"Uh huh, that's why you're all flustered?" She joked.

"Oh please Lita, it's not like you never did anything dirty in a fitting room before." Darien retorted in my defense.

"We were gonna go catch some dinner. Wanna go?" Lita asked changing the subject.

"Love to." I replied straightening out my dress.

"Well, Mina and Raye are outside waiting for us and Ami is wandering around the store so let's go."

------------

"So that's when I knew Raye was gay." Darien laughed.

"Oh geeze, I can't believe you walked in on us. That was _so_ embarrassing." Mina groaned.

"Serena, you couldn't even imagine what Darien made me do so our parents wouldn't find out." Raye laughed.

"Yeah, I had her clean my room, do my homework, and be my best friend's date to prom. It was great!" Darien giggled.

"Yeah, it was loads of fun, you ass."

"Oh come on Raye, it wasn't that bad. Keep in mind the look on Darien's face when he walked in with both of us buck ass naked and my-"

"Ok, I lived through it once; don't need to do it again Mina."

"Alright Serena, your turn to tell about the one thing that scarred you for life." Lita said as she sipped her Coke.

"Ummm, I don't really think there is anything. I'm a pretty tough person so I can handle a lot of things without it getting to me."

"Oh come on! There has to be something! Just think about it for a sec." Raye chimed in.

"Well, my freshman year at college I had to live on campus. I had a really nice dorm and a really nice room mate. We would talk about guys and how much they really bothered us and just silly girl things like that. Well, it turns out she was gay and she thought I was too It wasn't so much that she was being my friend but more like she was hitting on me. So, for my birthday she surprised me with a toy that we could both use. I was so embarrassed I didn't know what to do. I tried to make a joke out of it and it really pissed her off. She took it away from me and hit me with the dildo across the face and moved out the following day."

"Wow. That's really funny! You got pimp smacked by a dildo." Lita laughed.

"It wasn't that funny. She hit me so hard; I had a bruise in the shape of a penis on my face for about 2 weeks. The looks I got…I stayed in my room when I wasn't in class. No matter how much make up I put on, I couldn't cover it up."

"Are you ready?" Darien asked in between laughs.

"Oh sure, make me tell that and then make me leave!"

"We better get going too, sweetie." Ami said quietly as she leaned into Lita.

"Well fine, since no one wants to hang out with us it looks like you're gonna get lucky tonight." Raye joked as she looked at Mina.

"Ok, we're going." Darien interrupted as he grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the booth.

------------

We walked out of the little Coney Island and into the warm summer night's air. Our walk started off in silence. I silently marveled at the bright lights and the bustling people scurrying up and down the streets like little mice. It was actually a little over whelming. I've lived here for only a short time and I'm still a little scared of the "big city life".

"Are you going to be able to make it back to your apartment if we walk?" Darien asked breaking me of my thoughts.

"Yeah, it's only a few blocks."

"You looked beautiful in that wedding dress."

"Thanks. It felt awkward to have it on."

"Why?"

"I don't know. I mean I'm not getting married…well not anytime soon, and it's not like I have a boyfriend per se."

God, I hope he gets the hint! Please Darien, don't be stupid….

"I see. Well, when you do finally get married, that's the gown for you."

What a fucking dumb ass! Seriously! I gave him the bait, all he had to do was latch on!

"Darien?"

"Yeah?"

"What are we?"

"What do you mean what are we? Like as a human race or entity as a whole?"

"What?! No! I mean, you and me. Are we friends with benefits or boyfriend/girlfriend? What are we?"

"Oh…I had a feeling that's what you meant."

"Ok, so answer my question."

"Well Serena, to be honest, I like you. A lot. But I'm not one for committed relationships. I told you that before. I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong idea. You deserve more then a friends with benefits relationship."

"So, do we stop?"

"Stop what?"

"Stop whatever it is you're doing. Do we go back to the professional relationship?"

"If that's what you want. I'll hold off on having sex until this little thing runs its course."

"I see."

I looked down at the ground and watched as the concrete got blurry from the tears forming in my eyes. What an asshole! Silly Serena, what were you thinking?! Why did you even get involved?! Because you wanted to change your life, that's why. Don't let him get the best of you, be strong. Don't show him he's hurt you.

"Are you alright Serena?"

"Fine." I managed to stammer out as I walked in front of him.

"Serena, wait." He called after me.

"I'll see you at 7 tomorrow morning Darien. Have a good night." I shouted as I crossed the street.

I didn't know if he was running after me or not and frankly I didn't care. How could I let myself get involved like that? I know better. God, I'm so stupid. I guess it was nice while it lasted. For a short amount of time I felt beautiful and smart and I think I might've actually loved myself if only for a brief moment in time. Never again will I be the one getting hurt.

--------

"Raye, don't worry about it."

"I'm gonna beat his fucking ass Serena, I swear. He can be a real douche sometimes!"

"Just let it go. Please? Don't make it any worse then it is."

"No, that's not fair. He hurt you and he needs to have a good ass beating."

"Raye, I'm going to go take a hot bath and try to forget about it. I'll talk to you later."

Before she could argue anymore with me or try and make me feel better, I hung up the phone. Apparently Darien didn't have the balls to call me so he made Raye do it. I guess it's cool of her to be on my side but really, who cares anymore? I don't; well, I'm trying not to.

"Hello kitty." I said as Luna jumped onto my stomach and lay down. Gently I stroked her head and smiled as she closed her eyes and purred.

"You'll never hurt me, right Luna? At the end of the day, you're really all I have."

Don't cry Serena. It'll be ok. You'll get by, you always have before. Men are stupid, throw rocks at them.

---------

"Tanelian, my office. Now."

"Right away, sir."

I rolled my eyes and pushed my chair away from my desk. Darien and I had taken our jogs in the morning and he'd call me periodically throughout the day to see what I was up to, but he stopped coming over to hang out. It had been two weeks since our little fall out. My apartment felt so lonely now that he wasn't there. On the bright side, I've lost twenty pounds! Only three and half more months!

"Yes, sir?" I knocked gently as I opened the door.

"Serena, this is Andrew Stevenson. He is going to be my new partner. He's a dear friend of my son's and of my family. Treat him well."

My eyes gazed over to the handsome young man sitting down in the oversized leather chair. Whereas Darien was oh-my-God-I-think-I'm-going-to-orgasm hot, Andrew was hey-you're-pretty-cute-I'd-sleep-with-you-if-you-buy-me-a-drink hot. He stood up to shake my hand and I swallowed hard at how attractive this man really was. His sandy blonde hair was cut short and neat, not at all like Darien's sex hair look. He was the same height, same build as Darien but his manners surpassed Darien's by a long shot.

"Serena, it's a pleasure." He gently shook my hand.

"The same to you Mr. Stevenson."

"Oh Serena, please call me Andrew."

"Yes sir, I mean, Andrew."

"Serena, perhaps you could take Andrew to lunch, make him feel welcome." Mr. Shields grunted as he lit a cigar.

"Oh, only if Mr. Stevenson would like to. There's no pressure." I stuttered.

"The pleasure would be mine. Grab your things and let's go." Andrew gestured towards the door.

I smiled as I walked out into my cubicle and grabbed my purse. I straightened my black suit coat out and held my head high as I walked out of the office with Counselor Andrew Stevenson.

----------

"So how do you know Darien?"

Oh shit, what do I say? He's my 'personal trainer' if you know what I mean :wink wink:?

"I work with one of his sisters friends."

"Oh you mean Raye's fiancée Mina."

"Yeah…" I whispered.

"Oh don't worry about it; her secret is safe with me. I've known Raye was a lesbian since high school when Darien made her go to prom with me."

"Yeah, I heard about that. Must've been awkward, huh?"

"Not as awkward as you might think. I didn't know she was gay until I tried to kiss her and she slapped me."

"I didn't know she was gay until I saw Mina hugging Darien."

"Serena, this is totally off topic, but I was wondering if you'd like to have dinner with me sometime."

Wow, leave it to a guy to throw me off guard. As soon as Andrew asked me that I started choking on my sandwich.

"Are you ok?" Andrew asked concerned as I hacked up a lung and a few other body parts alongside my chewed up bolus.

"Fine." I gasped in between coughs.

"Was it something I said?" He asked.

"No, it's just that you caught me off guard. I'm fine."

"Well, what do you say? Nothing personal, just two co-workers getting more acquainted, that's all."

"Sounds wonderful."

Wow, did he just ask me out and I accept?! Holy shit! Perhaps Darien ditching me wasn't a terrible thing.

"How about tonight at 6:30? I'll pick you up?"

"Alright." I smiled sweetly.

"Excellent, I'll see you then."

---------

"You can't go out with him, Serena."

"You can't tell me what to do Darien." I said as I walked around my apartment getting ready for my date. Apparently Mina can't hold a secret; news traveled to Mina that Andrew and I were going on a date which made it's way to Raye and finally to Darien who showed up at my house only a few minutes ago which brings me to my current situation.

"Serena, Andrew's a player. He's only going to try to get in your pants."

"Sounds familiar, doesn't it? Remember who dumped who Darien."

I reached down and put my little diamond studs in my ears and grabbed my dress off the bed. No, I wasn't naked in front of Darien, I had a slip on!

"Zip me up."

"No."

"Darien, stop acting like this is my fault and zip me up."

"No. I refuse to let you go out looking like that."

"What's wrong with my outfit?! This is all stuff you helped me pick out!"

"Serena, you look like you're going on a date!"

"That's because I am, moron!"

"Serena, I can't let you do this."

Without saying another word, he grabbed me and pressed his lips hard against mine. How I missed his taste, his touch. It'd been a half month without it and I missed it like it had been years. His hands pressed my body close to his as his mouth continued its assault on mine. It was like I didn't have any control of my hands when they entwined themselves in his hair. If it wasn't for the loud knocking on the door, I might actually have fallen into Darien's trap.

Abruptly, I pulled away from him and looked square in the eyes. It had to have been instinct or Darien's greatest gift was giving me a set of brass balls; I reached up and slapped him across his cheek as I walked out of my bedroom and towards the front door desperately trying to zip my dress along my way. I fluffed my hair and bit my swollen lips as I opened the door.

"What the hell are you thinking?!" Raye shrieked when I opened the door.

"What?!"

"Serena, why are you going out with Andrew? Did he offer you a promotion if you have a threesome with him?" Mina shoved her way through the door, nearly knocking Raye over.

"Would you two cut it out? He asked me out strictly as a co-worker."

"Really? You don't look like 'just co-workers' in that red cocktail dress, missy." Raye retorted as she commented on (what I thought was incredibly cute and sexy) little red dress.

"Darien aren't you going to do anything?!" Mina yelled at the man who sat slumped down in a chair.

"I can't stop her. I don't know what else to do." He sighed as he held his head in his hands.

"Oh my God people, I'm going out to dinner, you make it sound like this is an intervention because I'm a crackwhore!"

Between the commotion of the angry lesbians and a pissed off Darien, I heard a short rapid knock at the door. Quickly I ducked between the three and opened the door.

"These are for you." Andrew said as he handed me a small bouquet of lilies.

"Oh, they're beautiful. Thank you so much, please come in. They were just leaving." I said as I glared at Mina, Raye and Darien.

"Darien! It's been awhile, man. How's it been?" Andrew said as he held his hand out to Darien.

"It's been better. I hear you work for my dad now."

"Yeah, I just graduated law school and was looking for a job. You dad said he needed a partner and offered me the job."

"He should've put an ad in the paper." Raye scoffed.

"Raye, it's nice to see you too." Andrew said as he hugged her.

"Don't forget about me." Mina smiled as she held her arms out towards the large man.

"Well, are you ready Serena?" Andrew asked sweetly as I came back from putting the flowers in water.

"Whenever you are."

"Hey, I have an idea! Why don't we all go out to dinner together? We can catch up on old times!" Mina squeaked as I grabbed my purse. I quickly turned around and shot her an evil look.

"Yeah, I mean we haven't hung out in years. What do you say, Drew?" Darien added.

"Well, if Serena doesn't mind, it sounds like a plan. What do you say Serena?'

"Sounds wonderful." I gritted through my teeth.

Andrew, Mina and Raye walked out of the front door and down the hall towards the elevator.

"I'm going to kick your ass when we come home." I whispered to Darien as I locked the door.

"What? It was Mina's idea."

"I'm going to poke her eyes out later after I'm done giving you a new ass hole."

"Hey you two, let's go!" Raye shouted from down the hall.

"Coming."

-------

"So that's when your dad called me to see if I wanted the position." Andrew spoke while leaning back in his chair, his scotch in hand.

"No you idiot, it's because you needed a job and he pitied you." Raye slurred through her martini's.

"Well, I think it's time to take her home." Mina broke in.

"Darien, put your wallet away, dinner and drinks are me." Andrew insisted.

"I'll pay for Serena and I, Andrew."

"Don't be silly. _I'll_ pay for Serena." Andrew said as he shot me one hell of a smile.

The waitress came and took the bill and Andrew's credit card before Darien could say another word. I could hear him grumble under his breath but I was too buzzed to make it out or even care.

"Are you ready, my dear?"

"Of course." I flirted.

---------

Darien insisted that we all three share a cab ride back to my apartment. I knew what he was doing. He didn't want me to be alone with Andrew.

"Well Serena, I had a wonderful time tonight. Thanks for the lovely evening."

"I had a great time too. Thanks for dinner."

"Yeah thanks for dinner, Drew. It was nice of you." Darien stepped in between us.

"You're welcome."

Then the three of us were standing there in awkward silence. Couldn't Darien get the hint?!

"Ummm, Darien , would you mind giving me and Serena a moment?"

"Yeah sure…" As he continued to stand there like an idiot.

"Alone?" Andrew finally clarified.

Darien cleared his throat and shifted uncomfortably as he walked towards the entrance of my building.

"You look beautiful tonight Serena. I really had a wonderful time with you."

He leaned in slowly and gently touched my lips with his. It was soft and sweet. Nothing like Darien's hot passionate ones. He pulled away leaving me with a happy look upon my face and a smile across my lips.

"Well, goodnight. See you tomorrow."

Andrew gave me one last smile before he turned and walked towards the cab. I walked up the steps going to the front door only to be confronted by an angry Darien.

"You kissed him, didn't you!"

"It's none of your business Darien."

"It is my business Serena. You're getting involved with someone you know nothing about."

"Darien, why does it bother you so much?! Why can't you just let me be?! First you insult me, then you're sweet and want to help me, then you tell me you're falling for me and do dirty things that would make my mother turn in her grave, then you tell me you're not ready for committed relationships and finally you tell me that I can't be with anyone else but you don't want me. So what am I supposed to do?! Wait until you're ready for me? Leave you hanging like you left me? What is it you want from me?!" I started to cry.

"I want you, Serena. I just want…you…"

---------

Ok so I haven't been eaten by a pack of rabid penguins or fallen off the face of Metro Detroit. I'm alive and well and writing and got rid of my writer's block WOOHOO! So this is 16 pages on Microsoft word just for you lovely, faithful readers/reviewers. Leave me some love and I'll return the favor by giving you another fun filled chapter! Until then, happy reading!


	11. Chapter 11

What could I do? What should I do? Do I tell him I want him too? God, this was so confusing. I want him, I really do, but I can't help but think about how he just left me hanging like that. And now there's Andrew who seems like a really nice guy and I like him. I'm seriously considering becoming gay myself.

"I'm sorry Darien, you had your chance. I won't let you hurt me again." I finally answered in a half whisper half sob.

That was probably the hardest thing I had ever said or done. It felt like my heart was going to be ripped into a million pieces.

"Please don't leave me Serena." He finally whispered.

"I'm sorry. I can't." I cried as I opened the door and stepped in.

I waited impatiently for the elevator, as the doors opened and I stepped in, Darien stood looking at me through the glass with a forlorn look on his face. The last image I saw before the large steel doors shut was Darien slam his hand in the bricks and walk away.

'This isn't your fault, Serena. He had his chance. You did the right thing.' I kept thinking.

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The ringing phone woke me up at some ungodly hour of the night. I reached my hand over to the nightstand and let it feel around for the stupid thing.

"Hello?" I groaned as I opened my eye (yes, singular) and looked at the clock.

"Serena? It's Raye."

"Raye it's 3:40 in the morning."

"I know but you need to come over to Darien's apartment like right now."

Suddenly both eyes flew open and I jerked up, my body sitting on the edge of the bed. If you want to get my attention, this was the way to do it.

"Why? What happened? Is he ok?"

"It's a long story. Can you come over now?"

"I don't know where he lives." I said as I balanced myself on one leg trying to put my jeans on.

"He's not even ten minutes away. Broadway and fifth, the apartments on the left side. Apartment 906 B."

"I'm on my way."

I threw the phone on my bed, reached into my closet for a hoodie and flip flops and rushed out of the apartment praying that everything was alright.

-------

"Sorry to call you over here this late…or early." Raye said as she hugged me.

"What happened?" I asked hurriedly looking around the large living room for Darien.

"He had a little too much to drink is what happened. Mina is in there trying to calm him down but he wouldn't stop throwing things and yelling your name. I'm hoping you can help."

I looked a little more closely at the room; the wooden floors were covered in broken glass from liquor bottles, the plants turned over with the dirt spilled from the pots.

"Where is he?"

Raye walked down a short narrow hallway, I followed her closely.

"What are you doing out here?" Raye asked Mina who was standing outside the door.

"He kicked me out and locked the door." Mina yawned. "Hi Serena."

"Hi Mina. Maybe I should try to talk to him."

Gently I knocked on the door only to back away abruptly when I heard something being thrown and crashing against the back of the door.

"Darien it's Serena. Can I come in?"

The door opened quickly, Darien's strong arm reaching around the door and grabbing me pulling me inside his room. The room was dark as Hell. Blood red walls, black furniture and bedding.

He had one little lamp on which cast eerie shadows across the four walls and even Darien. He leaned into the doors of the closet, his bare back to me., the muscles tensing with every breath.

"Darien, you want to talk to me?" I asked gently as I sat down in one of the chairs by the bed.

"You're not leaving, Serena. You're going to stay here forever." He finally spoke in a harsh voice.

"Darien, sit down on the bed and let's talk."

"No!" He yelled as he threw a bottle of whiskey against the back of the door, the glass shards flying everywhere.

"Ok, you don't have to sit down, but you do have to talk to me. I can't help you unless I know what's wrong."

I worked up the nerve to walk over to him, gently placing my hand on his back.

"Please? Don't shut me out." I spoke softly.

I watched as the tension from his muscles slowly relaxed.

He turned around to face me, the dim light creating dancing shadows across his half naked body. His arms reached around to grab to me, holding me close to him. He nuzzled his head into the crook of my neck and softly whispered into my ear.

"I love you Serena."

I closed my eyes as I felt tears start to form. I let out a huge sigh and let myself relax and fall into his grasp.

"What?" I managed to choke out.

"I love you. I realized it when I saw you with Andrew. I realized it when I saw you in that wedding gown. No one has ever made me fell this way. I know we've only known each other for just a few months, but Serena, I have never felt like this before. When I'm not with you and I'm dying and when I am with you, it's like my whole world becomes a little brighter."

"Darien, I don't think you know what you're saying. You've had a little too much to drink that's all. Come tomorrow when you're sober and hung-over, you'll regret ever saying it. You need sleep."

"Serena, don't you get it?! I want you, I _need_ you!" He cried as he grabbed my arms harshly.

He leaned his head into mine and his lips embraced my lips in a kiss of pure passion, lust, and love. I sighed deeply as he pulled me close to him, my lungs burning for air. At the moment, breathing was optional. He pinned me against the wall, my hands above my hand. He unzipped my hoodie leaving me exposed to the cool air.

He lowered his head to my breast, taking it in his mouth. I moaned at how wonderful his hot mouth felt. My hands broke free from his and entwined in his ebony locks.

His hands played with the zipper of my jeans trying to unfasten them as quick as he could. Before I could even digest what was going on, his hand slipped inside my pants gently stimulating my most sensitive spots.

"Tell me you love me Serena." He growled in my ear.

"I…I…" I managed to stutter out.

"Tell me!"

He slammed his fingers inside me, a deep throaty moan escaping through my lips. He brought his mouth to mine again, his tongue forcing its way in, assaulting my senses.

"Let me make love to you Serena. Let me show you how much I love you." He whispered in my ear.

As much I could feel myself falling further away from reality, at the same time I could feel myself pulling back.

"Darien, please. I can't do this." I cried as I broke away from him, gasping for air.

I reached for my discarded hoodie and quickly covered up. I walked past him and towards the door. I tried to hold back the tears that so desperately wanted to spill. How could he do this to me? How could he let me go so easy and then try to work his way back into my life?

"I'm sorry Darien." I whispered as I opened the door and walked out.

"Is he ok?" Mina asked as she woke up from a light sleep on the couch. Raye's lithe body softly snored as she turned over next to Mina.

"He'll be fine." I gave my best fake smile as I left the apartment.

--------

It had been about a week and a half since I left Darien's apartment. He didn't stop by my apartment anymore, his calls stopped; he didn't even show up for our jogs. I suppose this was for the best. I weighed myself this morning and I'm down to 178 woohoo! Only two and a half months to go.

"Tanelian, my office, now."

"Yes sir." I said with bitter disdain.

With great annoyance, I pushed my chair away from my desk, straightened out my skirt and walked into the Hell hole.

"You wanted to see me, sir?"

"Yeah, take these files to Andrew."

"Yes sir."

I took the heaping pile of papers off his desk and started towards the door.

"Serena, have you lost weight?"

"Yes I have, thank you."

"You look good."

I inwardly smiled as I opened the door and walked to the other side of the office towards Andrew's little dungeon.

"Hi Serena!" Mina chirped as she passed me.

"Hi Mina." I said rather bitterly without meaning to.

"What happened to Darien?" She asked quietly.

"What do you mean?"

"Well he hasn't answered Raye's phone calls, he won't answer his door. We were getting worried but I figured I'd ask you before we jumped to any conclusions."

"No, I don't know what happened. Last time I saw him was the night we all went to dinner."

"You know he has deep feelings for you, right?"

"He has a funny way of showing it. Shame on me, Mina, for falling for him and shame on him for breaking my heart. He had his chance."

I walked past her and towards Andrew's office, completely ignoring the hurt look upon her face.

"Good morning Serena." Andrew smiled as put down what he was doing and stood to his feet.

"Good morning. Mr. Shields wanted me to bring these to you." I smiled sweetly.

"Thank you."

"Looks like you're going to have a late night tonight?" I asked pointing at all the files.

"Well, if I have to spend long, grueling hours at work I'm glad I get to spend most of it with you."

He stepped away from his desk and stopped right in front of me, his face only inches away from mine. He smiled as he took the files out of my hands and placed them on his desk. I walked towards the door and opened it getting ready to walk out when he closed it, his body leaning in to me.

"Would you like to do dinner tonight? Just you and me?" He whispered into my ear.

"Yeah…" I managed to find my voice.

"Pick you up at 6:30?"

"I thought you had to work late."

"I can start tomorrow."

"Alright…" I whispered as I reached for the door handle behind me.

------------

"Serena you look stunning." Andrew said as I opened the door to my apartment.

"Thank you." I smiled sweetly.

I pushed my curled hair over my shoulder, grabbed my purse and Andrew and I walked out the door.

"Do you like Italian?" He asked as we stepped on the elevator.

"Yes, I love it."

"Good, we're going to a great little Italian restaurant I know."

"Andrew, this is completely off topic but have you heard from Darien since dinner the other night?"

He shifted uncomfortably and dryly replied, "No."

"I was worried about him; no one has heard from or seen him in a few days."

"I'm sure he's fine. He's probably with one of his 'clients'."

As soon as Andrew said that it felt like a pierce through my heart. Even if I couldn't be with Darien (well, right now anyway), I hoped he wasn't with anyone else. God, please let him be alright.

-------

"How is your dinner, Serena?"

"It's very good."

"Are you sure? You've been playing with it most of the night."

"I'm sorry Andrew; I don't mean to be such terrible company."

"You're not terrible company Serena. Want to tell me what's on your mind?"

"Nothing, it's just I'm worried about Darien."

"Serena, like I said, I'm sure he's fine. Don't worry, ok? I've known Darien a long time, and when he doesn't want to be found, no one can track him down. He'll call or stop by in a few days I'm sure."

"I hope you're right."

"Would some chocolate cake take your mind off of him?"

"No, thank you."

"A woman who doesn't want chocolate, how intriguing. Do you not like it?"

"No I love it but I'm on a diet. I'm trying to stay away from sweets and unnecessary fats."

"Serena, I think you're gorgeous. You don't need to go on a diet."

"Well, thank you Andrew. I've been dieting since June. I'm going to try to lose all my weight in six months. Around Christmas I'll meet my goal."

"That's awesome. I love a woman with determination."

I smiled and turned away. I loved how sweet and charming Andrew was but he was nothing like Darien. Darien was so…different. He made me feel beautiful without even telling me.

"Are you ready to go?"

"Yeah, I think we should just call it a night." I smiled.

--------

"I had a good time Serena, despite what you think."

"Thank you for understanding Andrew. I had a good time too. I'm sorry if I wasn't very good company."

"We'll do it again some time. You were pleasant company."

Slowly his lips leaned into mine. It was a soft gentle kiss. I backed away abruptly catching him completely off guard.

"I'm sorry Andrew, I just can't."

"I understand. Have a good night Serena."

He placed a soft kiss on my cheek and walked down the street. I walked into the building and pressed the button for the elevator. As I stepped on I looked at the glass doors remember how I left Darien there. It was my fault he was missing! I was lying when I said I didn't want to be with him. Damn it Serena, you could've been happy.

After settling in, I grabbed a blanket and a hot cup of tea and sat out on the balcony. The cool September air swept all around me causing me shiver slightly. If Darien had been here, he would've held me close keeping me warm. He would've protected me, made me feel safe.

'Darien's not here Serena; you need to come to terms with that.' I kept telling myself.

I sniffled as I felt the tears building up in my eyes. How could I have been so stupid! He was right there, the man of my dreams, telling me he loved me, he wanted me. But I turned him down because I was afraid of getting hurt! I couldn't help but sob as I pictured my wedding, my house, and my children all with Darien by my side.

--------

I had been at work since 8 this morning and it was going on 6. I tried to keep myself busy with work so I wouldn't think about Darien or Andrew. Andrew and I had a few more dates since the last one a few weeks ago. The weather was getting colder and the leaves were changing colors.

I kept thinking about Halloween coming up in a few weeks which was really the only thing that made me happy. That and the fact I was down to 162 and a size 14! Could you believe it?! I wish Darien could be here to help me celebrate. I only have two months to go.

"Good night, Serena." Mina said as she walked by my desk.

"Mina, have you heard from Darien?"

"No, Raye is getting really worried. He still won't answer his phone or door. It's not like him to just disappear like that without telling Raye."

"I'll try calling him, who knows maybe he'll answer."

"If you hear from him, please let us know."

"Mina I'm so stupid." I started to cry.

"It's ok Serena." She soothed as she hugged me.

"He was right there telling me he loved me and I just walked out on him. How could I be so dumb?"

"Serena, Darien doesn't make things easy. He's not one to show his feelings or emotions so when he told you he loved you and you rejected him, it probably felt like a knife through his heart. I'm not saying this to upset you or make you feel guilty, I'm saying this because I know you love him too. You need to tell him, show him how you feel. Right now, he's probably in hiding trying to cope with a broken heart. You can fix it, Serena."

"How?"

"Well for starters, you need to stay away from Andrew. If you love Darien Serena, then you need to break it to Andrew before things get serious with you two."

"Oh Mina, what have I done?!" I sobbed as I held my head in my hands.

"Find Darien and make things right and ditch Andrew. He still loves you Serena. Despite what you think or feel, Darien loves you with all his heart."

Mina consoled me and gave me excellent advice on how to find Darien. She offered me half of a Hershey's bar and told me chocolate was the cure for bad sex and broken hearts.

After Mina left it was just me in the office. The lights were half on-half off which made the creepy old building even creepier. I started my media player on my computer and played a little classical music to help ease my tension.

"Hello Serena." Andrew said as he walked towards my desk.

"Hey, why are you still here?"

"Oh, I had some work I had to catch up on. Late night for you too?"

"Yeah, I couldn't concentrate earlier so I decided to stay late and finish."

"Still thinking about Darien?"

"Yeah. I'm really worried."

"Serena, I told you I'm sure he's fine. It kills me to see you so sad." He said as he kissed my hand.

"Andrew we need to talk."

"You love him don't you." He said more as a statement then a question.

"Yeah. I'm sorry; I didn't realize it until recently. I never meant to get you involved."

"It's ok Serena, I understand. Go after him."

He gave me a light peck on my cheek and I grabbed my stuff and raced out of the office. My heart was going a million miles a minute as I pressed the button for the elevator.

Inwardly I felt relieved. I was finally going after something worth fighting for; Darien. Quickly I pulled out my cell phone and dialed his number. It must've rang a million times before I finally got his voice mail.

"Darien, its Serena. I'm on my way to your apartment right now. Please be there! We need to talk." I rushed through the message as I walked into the garage towards my Jeep.

-----------

I knocked rapidly on the door.

Nothing.

I knocked again a little louder.

Nothing.

I was getting ready to walk away when I heard the door open. A huge smile appeared on my face as I turned around. As soon as it was there, it disappeared as I saw a beautiful woman in a short little dress answer the door.

"Can I help you?" She asked nicely with a strong Brooklyn accent. Her brown eyes looked like bronzed honey as they shone in the dim hallway light. She tossed her long auburn hair across her shoulders and smiled as she looked at me.

"Is this the apartment of Darien Shields?" I asked quickly praying I had picked the wrong apartment.

"Yes, he's in the showa'. Would you like to come in and wait for him?"

"No, thank you." I said as I tried to hold back the lump in my throat.

Before she closed the door I heard Darien's voice from the distance, "Who is it?"

"I don't know, why don't you come here?"

Darien walked to the front door in his towel, his face hardening as he looked me in the eyes.

"Serena. What are you doing here?"

"Can we talk?" I asked in a small voice.

"Molly, you want to wait for my inside?" He asked to the young woman.

She waved good-bye and closed the door, leaving me and Darien in the hallway alone.

"What did you want to talk about?" He asked as he crossed his arms across his chest.

"You haven't answered anyone's calls. We were worried."

"I've been busy." He replied coldly.

"You haven't been showing up for our jogs in the morning."

"I figured you knew the routine. You didn't need me there. I can see you've been doing well. You look great."

"I'm down in the 160's and a size 14. I'm happy. I love myself which was something I never thought I could do."

"You're a very beautiful woman Serena. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise."

"I love you." I blurted out.

"What?" Darien asked a bit bewildered.

"I…love you." I repeated.

"Is that what you came over here to tell me?"

"Yes, and to make sure you were ok."

"I see. I'm sorry Serena, but that ship has sailed."

"What? You told me you loved me! How can you just fall in and out of love so easy!? You never really loved me Darien but I was stupid enough to believe all the stupid lies that ever came out of your mouth! You seduced me and took advantage of me." I cried.

"If you were so stupid Serena, then why do you love yourself all of a sudden? Why are you fifty pounds thinner? I felt something for you Serena, I loved you in fact. I showed you how beautiful you really are. How is that taking advantage of you?"

How could I answer that? He was right. Not everything out of his mouth was a lie. I gained my self confidence back, I had a new perception of my body and I had self love.

"Good-bye Darien. I wish you the best."

I turned around and walked away. I tried to hold the tears in as best as I could. I waited until I got out into my car until I let the damn break and the water-works begin. I must've sat outside his building for an hour before I could finally drive away.

--------

The days turned into weeks, the weeks for months. I hadn't seen from or heard Darien in about two months now. It was hard to find the will to get up and jog and stay on my diet but I did it. I finally came to terms that he wasn't coming over anymore and I probably wouldn't see him until the girls wedding; assuming he showed up.

I watched as the weather got even colder and the snow started to fall covering the city in a blanket of white. I spent Thanksgiving with Raye, Mina, Lita and Ami. It was the first time I had spent a holiday with anyone in a long time and it felt good.

Darien didn't come which I guess was for the best. I had a few dates on and off but nothing serious. I am now a size 10 and weigh in at 145 pounds. My countdown is complete; I've met my goal of six months.

Raye and Mina's wedding was coming up the week before Christmas so we were all busy bustling around trying to get all the last minute wedding 'stuff' together. Both of them were getting very nervous considering they only had a few days left.

I finished the semester at school with a 3.6 GPA and graduated with honors. I'm going to be taking the bar exam after New Year's. I've been studying my ass off but I have a feeling I'll do well.

Mr. Shield's offered me a very nice position working for him. I'll bring home close to six digits a year and have the title as 'Counselor Serena Tanelian, Attorney at Law'. How awesome is that!

So that pretty much is my life as of now. Andrew and I have remained good friends, which means a lot. We're better off as friends then lovers. Perhaps I'm just bias that no one will ever be good enough for me except for Darien.

-------

"Can you zip me up please?" I asked Ami.

She finished applying her red lipstick and walked to where I was standing. I looked in the mirror still not believing that the woman in the reflection was me. My hair was curled and up except for a few tendrils that swept across my face.

My red dress showed off my new body with the tight bodice and knee length skirt. I don't think in all my years of being alive I had ever felt so beautiful and confident.

"Thank you." I said as Ami finished.

"You look beautiful Serena."

"Thanks, you do too. I suppose we should go check on the brides."

"Don't worry; you know you'll knock him off his feet."

"Who?"

"Darien silly. It's so obvious that you still want him."

"I haven't seen him since October Ami. I doubt he even remembers who I am."

"Serena, please forgive me for saying this, but…you can be so fucking naïve."

I turned away from the mirror to look at her completely taken back by what she just said.

"Let's go check on Mina and Raye." She smiled as she took my hand lead me out of the changing room.

"Mina you look so gorgeous!" I said as I hugged her.

Her white dress had a sheer collar that shimmered softly giving her milky skin a beautiful shimmery hue. Her hair fell in long golden waves across her back. I reached down and straightened out the long train.

"I'm so nervous Serena." She started to cry.

"Oh don't cry hun. You're going to ruin your make-up." I laughed as I hugged her.

"I just want to get this done."

"Mina, this is your wedding day. You're supposed to be nervous and scared. It'll be ok."

She took a few deep breaths and wiped the black streaks away from her eyes. She grabbed her lipstick from the counter and applied it with a shaky hand.

"Just breathe…" She kept whispering to herself.

"Oh Serena, you look fabulous!" Lita said as she walked in.

Her long brown hair was pulled into a loose ponytail, big curls falling across her shoulder. Her red dress fit her like a glove and she radiated with happiness.

"You do too." I smiled as I hugged her.

"I'm going to go check on Raye, I'll be back." I shouted.

I walked down the corridor to the other fitting room where Raye was busy getting ready.

"Do you need any help?" I asked as Beryl helped Raye put her veil on.

"Oh my God Serena I've never been so nervous." Raye giggled anxiously.

"It'll be ok. Between you and Mina, I swear one of you is going to have a heart attack. You need to calm down. Everything will be perfect."

Beryl finished pinning in the veil and scoffed at me as she walked out of the room. Her velvet aubergine gown clung to her body as she swung her ships with every step.

"God, I thought the bitch would never leave." Raye finally sighed as soon as Beryl was out of sight.

"Raye that's not very nice." I laughed.

"Well most trophy wives don't try to seduce their step-sons on their step-daughters wedding day."

"She after Darien again?"

"You bet your sweet ass she is. She's pissing me off. I swear, I'm gonna get you drunk and have you punch her fucking lights out again."

"Raye, this is your wedding day!" I scolded as I helped her put on her necklace.

"I know, I'm sorry. I'm tense."

"Are you ready, pumpkin?" Mr. Shields popped his head in.

"Is it time?"

"Yeah, all the guests are finished getting seated." He walked to her and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Serena, you look lovely this evening." He complimented as he gave me a light peck on the cheek.

"Thank you sir."

"Serena please call me Harold."

"Let's go!" Raye squeaked as she looked at herself in the mirror one last time.

All of us met out in the hallway except for Darien. Lita and Ami linked arms as they comfortably held their bouquets of white and red roses. Mina had to have been waiting with the judge who was going to marry them.

"Where's Darien?" Raye asked suddenly.

"He has to be around here somewhere, don't worry." Lita reassured.

Soon the music started. Lita and Ami began their journey step-by-step down the aisle, cameras flashing as they gave their most beautiful smiles. I stepped up to the doorway, ready to walk alone behind them when a strong arm wrapped around my waist.

"You weren't going to leave without me, were you?" Darien asked.

"I didn't think you were coming."

"I wouldn't miss it for the world. You look gorgeous by the way."

"You don't look too bad either." I smiled as we linked arms and walked down the white runner.

Darien and I separated on our respected sides. I stood next to Ami who had tears in her eyes as she watched Raye follow our footsteps with her father walking beside her.

The candles and dim Christmas lights in the hall cast lovely shadows in the room, their twinkling lights dancing in happiness as Raye finally stood next to Mina ready to promise a lifetime of love and happiness to each other and the rest of the crowd.

I didn't even hear the judge speak; I was too enthralled with Darien who only stared at me in return. I couldn't help but sniffle a little as Mina and Raye finally kissed as wife and…wife.

---------

"I can't believe how gorgeous you look." He commented as we danced.

"Why? Was I that ugly before?" I giggled.

"No, it's just…I haven't seen you in awhile. I had almost forgotten how stunning you are."

I didn't say anything. What does someone say to that? It was Darien's choice to end it. Why should I feel bad?!

"You ok, Serena?"

"Yeah, fine." I smiled my best fake smile. "I think I need to go home now."

I let go of him and made my way through the crowd towards the coat check. I grabbed my things and stepped into the cold winter air and hailed for a cab.

---------

I couldn't stop crying. I just lay on my couch still in my bridesmaid dress and bawled my heart out hoping that some sort of absolution would come from all the shed tears.

"Damn it." I cursed under my breath as I wiped the tears away from my eyes and regained my composure. I took a deep breath before I opened the door.

"What are you doing here?" I asked in a half whisper.

"I had to make sure you were alright. You just left earlier."

"I wasn't feeling well."

"Can we talk?" Darien asked as he walked in to my apartment and closed the door. 

"Yeah, I guess." I walked to the couch and plopped down, not really caring that he saw me looking like a raccoon.

"Serena, I don't know how or where to start so I'm just going to be straight and to the point."

"I know Darien, you're sorry for what happened and you want to stay good friends. Its fine, you didn't have to leave your sister's wedding to tell me that."

"That's not what I was going to say." He replied as he kneeled in front of me.

His fingers reached up to my face and turned my head to face him. My eyes clashed with his and our gazes met. He swallowed hard as he shifted onto his knees.

"I love you Serena."

That was all he needed to say, all I needed to hear. I wrapped my arms around him and sobbed uncontrollably. How I missed being in his arms! His scent intoxicated all of my senses.

"Don't cry…" He soothed as he gently touched my face and wiped away my tears.

Without saying a word he leaned in and grabbed my lips with his. It gentle but hungry. How I longed for his kiss, his touch. He pulled me to my feet as he brought my body closer to his. In one swift move he picked me up, gathering me in his arms like a fair maiden after being rescued by her prince just like in the fairy tales I've read.

He carried me into the bedroom his lips not once leaving mine. Gently he laid me down on the bed, his body lying next to mine. He kissed my ear, my neck, my collarbone.

"We're going to have sex now, Serena." He whispered in my ear.

I couldn't say a single word as my breath caught in my throat. He pulled my dress down and gently massaged the sensitive skin of my breast. His other hand reached behind my back and slowly unzipped the dress. In one swift move it was laying on the floor, leaving me bare except for a black bra and lace underwear. Darien shifted so he was on all fours, hovering over me. My hands reached up and pulled the tuxedo jacket from his broad shoulders.

"I love you…" I whispered as his hands unhooked my bra.

As soon as he pulled it off, his blue eyes looked directly into mine. I could finally see the sparkle of love that shone in them. His lips enraptured mine again as his tongue created an assault on mine. He sat up and ripped the shirt from his back. Buttons went skipping across the floor as bare skin touched bare skin. His arms wrapped around my body bringing me closer to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he gently pulled my underwear down my legs.

Before I knew it we were both naked. Darien looked deep in my eyes as he kissed me passionately.

"I love you Serena." He whispered as he wrapped my legs around his waist.

I arched my back as the sensations became too much for me to handle. The ball in the pit of my stomach grew bigger and bigger with every thrust. Darien spoke soft words of love in my ear as I neared the release I so desperately yearned for.

I managed to finally say "I love you" before my orgasm swept through my body like a tidal wave on a rampage.

Darien pumped harder and soon we were both climaxing, the colors of the rainbow flashing before my eyes. Darien collapsed on top of me in a sweaty heap. I couldn't move, it was like my limbs were made of Jell-O. Darien wrapped the blankets around us, pulling me close to him. He wrapped his arms around me, snuggling up behind me.

----------

"Merry Christmas Ami." Lita said as she handed Ami a small box from under the Christmas tree.

Ami smiled as she ripped through the snowman wrapping paper.

"They're beautiful!" Ami gushed as she gave a Lita a kiss.

"Let me see!" I squeaked. "Oh they are beautiful! What are they, about a caret?"

"Yeah! Ami lost her last pair of sapphire studs so I decided to get her a new pair."

"This is for Mina." Raye said as she handed Mina a gift.

"Ooo, I wonder what it is?" Mina smiled as Raye handed her an envelope.

Mina's fingers tore the envelope to shreds as she pulled out a piece of paper. Her eyes got as big as baseballs and she gasped in surprise.

"Are you serious?!" She shrieked.

Raye nodded rapidly as a smile spread across her lips. "I'm serious." She replied.

"What? What's going on?" Darien asked.

"You're going to be an uncle!" Mina jumped up and down.

"What?!" Darien asked enthusiastically.

"Raye and I had in-vitro done around Halloween. This is the letter from the clinic." Mina tossed the piece of paper to Darien and I.

"I'm so happy for you!" I said as I looked at the letter.

"This is for you Serena." Darien handed me a large box.

I smiled as I took the box, which was surprisingly light, and ripped through the wrapping paper. I opened the box only to find a smaller box. I kept ripping through more and more wrapping paper, the boxes getting smaller and smaller. Finally I came to a small ring box. Quickly I opened it and furrowed my brow when I realized it was empty. I looked to Darien who kneeled before, his hands holding mine.

"Serena, I don't want to spend the rest of my life without you. I have never been in love before but I know this is the real thing. You are everything to me. So I'm on my knees before my family and you, offering you a world of heated fights and morning jogs, but above all, I'm offering of a world of love. I love you Serena Tanelian with all my heart and soul and I will love you far after the last breath has escaped my lungs. Marry me." He showed me an antique diamond ring pinched beneath his white finger tips.

My eyes welled up with tears. I couldn't find my voice. I nodded 'yes' a million times as I wrapped my arms around his neck. Darien took the ring and placed it on my shaking finger.

------------

Andrew linked his arm in mine and we walked down the aisle. He smiled reassuringly as we waited for the music to start.

"Thanks for walking me down the aisle." I whispered.

"Serena, I wouldn't have missed this for the world. Are you ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be."

I couldn't take my eyes off of Darien waiting for me at the end of aisle. I handed my bouquet to Mina and turned to face the man of my dreams, the man who helped me change my life around, who helped me learn to love myself…Darien Shields…my husband and lover.

"Dearly beloved…"

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Fin! I had like a bazillion different ways to go with this story. I decided this was the best way. Hope you liked it as much as I did writing it. Your reviews have been inspiring and wonderful, thank you! Until the next story, happy reading!


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